Elizabeth

You sad... sad... sad... (repeat numerous times) thing you! Ugh... You got to stop screaming at yourself, yourself gets angry and yourself as well! ... Never... do this again! :P

This was so perfectly depressing! I liked it.... very nice... I liked it. And What purpose does the capital for Fire or Reality or Despair have? I'm a bit slow ...

And who said I4 shouldn’t be sexy. Gosh, and you tell me to be patient” I don't know if this is where the talking began or if the quotation mark ...

Whoa... I haven't read a poem like this in a long time.... Usually I gather a rhythem and turn it into a bit of a rap and this was so ...

I'm so heartbroken right now. My boyfriend broke up with me and I remember I was totally suspicious about him when he was on the phone with other girls so ...

Augh, no offense but if you rhyme once you should rhyme the entire poem, not cutting the rhyme off ever now and then. THAT'S WRONG! The first 8 lines seemed ...

It reminded me of that song that's like FLY LIKE AN EAGLE SO MY SPIRIT CAN BE FREE I liked it... nice flow... although I wouldn't capitalize Take before that ...

You shouldn't rush a story... That's like a totally bad thing to do unless it's due in 30 seconds... "Still after three tears the teachers were careful around her." Metophor ...

You know, why bother posting this if you won't let people bloody say things about it? I mean the whole point of critique if there isn't anything bad to be ...

As blood runs through my veins, I can hear the beating of my heart..

It rhymed very awkwardly.... the first for lines and then it never rhymed again. No offense but rhyming is for the old people... I never rhyme and if I do ...

AHAHA I'm sorry that was kinda funny though. Honestly, it was funny, short, simple, just like a haiku should be. I liked it... Nothing I could help with without turning ...

Hee hee. Angry aren't we? This was pretty decent... You can always make some lines about what the bread is made of. Hatered, anger, spit... revenge? :twisted: AHAHAHA... AHA... Well ...

Such innocent eyes, I truly despise You So evil You are So callous. These lines confused me... Is it like "I truely despise you! So evil, you are, so callous!" ...

Oh this was so beautiful! I don't recall reading any of your works, but I'll be sure to keep on reading, since now this piece grabbed me. It was beautifully ...