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Re: {Cruelty and the Beast}
Hi! So, I really liked this poem. I wasn't familiar with Elizabeth Báthory, so I read her Wikipedia profile, and I'll say that you definitely captured her life well! Your ...
Apr 25, 2010 -
Re: The Sands of Hell
Hi! This is pretty good, but I had one little problem with it, and that lies with your imagery! It's very tell-y. For instance, you mention that the place is ...
Apr 25, 2010 -
Re: Pebbles (Edit)
Hi! Do you have a webcam, or even just a video camera? Tape yourself singing it, and then upload it to YouTube! Then you can post it along with your ...
Apr 25, 2010 -
Re: To my best friend, it's ok to be a sunflower
Hi! Okay, so I admit that I really liked this poem. Your rhythm and rhyme scheme were both good, and your simple word choice and imagery told exactly what they ...
Apr 25, 2010 -
Re: Don't Believe The Hype
Hi! So, this was okay. I appreciate what you're trying to do by making us aware but drugs and all of that, but there wasn't anything particularly memorable in this ...
Apr 25, 2010 -
Re: Dracula
Hi! Okay, so first I really think that this should be moved to fan-fiction short stories, considering that you're writing your own story about characters that have already been established. ...
Apr 24, 2010 -
Re: Sleep Driver
Hi! To be honest with you, I didn't enjoy the piece. You have to be real careful for silly grammatical errors-one proofread and you could caught a good chunk of ...
Apr 24, 2010 -
Re: All Around Me
Okay, Hi Forest! I thought I'd drop by and give you a review, especially since I feel somewhat bad about not letting you in my storybook. So, having not heard ...
Apr 22, 2010 -
Re: As each minute passes by
Hi! Okay, so, whenever you're trying a new form of art, it's best to understand basic formatting to what you're writing. Just by looking this I can tell you've never ...
Apr 22, 2010 -
Re: A Flash Fiction
Hi! So, I liked this. Within such a short amount of time, you capture the setting and the characters really well. However, I think that this could be a little ...
Apr 21, 2010 -
Re: The Memory
Hi Teddy! So, this was cute. I like how your narrator is all scared and that, and your simple, flat imagery I adored. However, I think I wanted to like ...
Apr 21, 2010 -
Re: Who Am I?
Hi! So, I'm not quite sure why you posted this if it's a few years old. Do you want to recycle the idea? Are you just comparing what you wrote ...
Apr 20, 2010 -
Re: Honeydrops Ahoy!
Hi! Sorry that this is going to be a short review, but there was only one minor thing that irked me. Okay, so I'm not sure what to think about ...
Apr 19, 2010 -
Re: Scavengers (Final Scene)
Hi. No exclamation marks like usual, because I'm just not in the mood. I went back and re-read the last couple of scenes, and I just want to comment on ...
Apr 18, 2010 -
Re: couture no more
Hi! Welcome to YWS! :elephant: To the poem! I rather liked it, but it seemed a bit unfocused, and I didn't really know what was going on. Well, I did ...
Apr 18, 2010
