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Hello again! Dorothy supposed that made sense, but she wasn’t sure that she wanted to stay up until two in the morning just to find out that she didn’t win. ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. Readability (info-dumps, boring parts, unclear parts) Lincoln got on a stop after her. He wore casual clothes and his wrinkles and gray hair suggested that ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. I am a steam locomotive, fighting and pounding down the tracks. Nice line! I like how “fighting” hints at a struggle. The water which is ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. Since you’re basically personifying humanity, I think it would read smoother to remove the “the’s.” Like, who is humanity? Humanity is care, humanity is kindness, ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. First, I like your idea of humanizing weather, in a sense. You also gave me a feeling of nostalgia. I loved reading poems that rhymed ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts! He jumped over the fence, and landed right on a plant of unripened tomatoes. Remove the comma. Rhys sat up straighter, thinking for a moment, ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. From first glance, I thought the formatting was unique though slightly jarring. I feel like this is reading between the lines. Like, one person is ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. I’m just noting a few things I had questions about or that stood out to me. i was cursed with her wide hips and curly ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. I really enjoyed your descriptions, and all of them are delightful. They made me feel emerged in the story. I also like how butterfly wings ...

Hello! I read the first chapter of your story, but I’m mostly jumping into this blind. There are a lot of interesting tidbits swirling around here, Shadow Engineers, aliens, animal ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts! She jumps a bit from the random shadow. This is a good spot to show and not tell. Simply, saying “She jumps back.” Let’s us ...

Hello! Here are my thoughts. What I really enjoyed? First, I loved the names. I also enjoyed your descriptions of the characters and the surroundings. I felt like I could ...

Hello! CHARDONNAY I’m leaving. Sal points towards the exit. SAL The door is that way. This bit is fun. I see a lot of Sal's personality here. Sounds good so ...

Hello! There were several horses, each one carrying a man with leather armor, a short sword, and a crossbow. There were a few wagons, drawn by an ox each, and ...

Quirky! I liked it! The tone's light-hearted and fun. I think Jake has a lot of personality in his thoughts. He seems prideful and a little sassy. A young boy. ...