Alainna

My heart was pounding when I read that...I swear one of these days your writings going to cause me some sort of heart attack from suspense. Anyways, fab stuff! The ...

This was very good although I think that biancarayne is right. Your characters need to be more distinguishable and less...soppy. I like your writing, especially the first part but they ...

This was good. At the moment I'm finding hard to imagine it being a song. What genre would it be? You are a mean greedy old man. This seems like ...

WOW. I read the first paragraph and knew that this piece was going to be great. (shortsbarefeetnoshoes) Although I could make out these parts it would seem better if they ...

Hey JC, this was some emotional stuff!!! I have nothing in the form of crit for this piece, just praise. :D Short and to the point, I can't wait for ...

OK, this is still going strong and your writing has improved from the beginning however this chapter wasn't as strong as the previous two. I won't bother echoing what Sworddance ...

I'm really enjoying reading this! There weren't that many visible mistakes that have not been pointed out already, so well done. My real crit is exactly what Sam and JC ...

Hey JC, this was very good!!! The begging was great and raw but it kind of dithered around the point when Jake left and then fizzled out. Could there have ...

This piece was very emotive and it was that that kept my attention the whole way through. The sound of an angel's voice calls me over as I step off ...

I'm really getting into your writing and I like your story line. Most of the crit has been done for me already but... "So...meet any...boys?" Edna asked, eyes wide. You ...

This was really good and now I'm hooked!!! I can't really crit much as I didn't find any mistakes and others have already pointed most praise from me!!! Just be ...

Your writing has really improved!! I don't love acting, Ms. Jackson makes it really fun. Use a connective instead of a comma, and 'really fun' can be worded better. "Now, ...

This Chapter was an improvement on the last!!!! I liked it and can't wait to read more!!! so I turn to Gina wo nods Typo, *who*. Carmen sighs and changes ...

Hey Rosie, This was good but it's falling scarily into the pot of cliche YA. I'm not going to echo what everyone else has already said but my advice is ...

YAY!!! A longer piece. This was good and I'm glad it was from Corrie's POV. And Papa would have no clue about it at all. Whose Papa? :? Did I ...