Slit ch 4

by truealpha

Published June 19, 2014

18+ Language

In there will be blood

Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language.

“Okay what? Who knows what I look like?” I asked frantically

“What? oh nobody… Nobody knows what you look like. Anyway do you want to practice your ability now or what?” Ryan asked

“Okay no!… no no no! don’t you give me that ‘what oh nobody’ bullshit. Freaking tell me, I have a right to know!” I demanded

“Alright fine, this person and I have had some problems in the past. She… is a crossbreed her species are bunnies… or rabbits… or hares. I don’t know what she calls them but she’s a crossbreed that’s apart of a group of crossbreeds that are fighting against the government and were kind of on bad terms with her” He explained.

“Wait what they’re fighting the government? How can people fight the government?” I asked

“You think I know? To answer that: no!”

“Okay fine that was a dumb question. So why are you on bad terms with her?” I asked

“She’s trying to recruit as many crossbreeds as possible; a few months ago she tried to get me to join, like she really wanted me to join. And I refused” he explained

“Why would she want you to join? you seem kind of… hard to work with” I stated

“Thank you. But I’m pretty sure she knows I can be very useful. Since I have attributes of… you know cats. And let me tell you there are tons of cats in the world. So as you know my abilities go a long way when things get… bad” He said with a smirk.

Now as I thought about it he would be cable person. With features of different types of cats… jaguars, tigers, cheetahs… lions. When I think about it he could probably tear me a new one if it came down to it. Now I understand why they want him… and now that I think about it…

“Wait she got that rabbit to follow me then does that means that she wants me to join?” I asked.

“You’re damn right, you have the crossbreed attributes of some kind of lizard either that or reptiles in general, I don’t know exactly. But she’ll diffidently come looking for you with those damn soulless eyes and buck teeth” He said knitting his brow

“So what do I do then?”

“Well you can either A: you can not go to School because she goes there” he said

“She goes to our school?!”

“Yes and stop yelling it hurts my ears. But you know there’s also option B: just constantly say no. I mean besides make you paranoid what else can she do alone” He said in a not so confident tone.

“Well shit! Another problem I have to deal with eventually” I said putting a hand on my face in annoyance “Okay I’ll deal with this when it gets to me. I think I just want to test out what I can do for the time being”

“Alright, fine I myself don’t know anything about lizards but I’m sure you do. Just follow me. Oh and take off your shoes” Ryan said as he headed to my door

“Why?” I questioned

“Just do it! Don’t question me” He stated as he left my room.

I sighed and crossed my arms “great… this should be fun” I then kicked off my shoes and shocks and I followed him “Dad I’m going out for a bit okay?” I said moving to the front door.

“Oh you’re actually going out, wow that’s a rare once in a life time thing” he said jokingly.

“Screw off Dad, I’ll be back in a few” I said walking out the door. To see Ryan in front looking directly into my eyes.

“You got a nice little relationship with your dad there. That must be nice… So I take it he didn’t remarry”

“No… he didn’t... let’s just go to where ever it is you want to go” I said.

“Right alright gotcha” Ryan said as he walked out the drive way as I followed. We walked and walked for a while until we found our way to a fence that blocked off Green vale forest.

“Green vale forest? Were doing this here?” I said looking at the fence

‘Yea, now jump the fence before someone sees us” Ryan said as he swiftly jumped the fence with ease, which was very surprising for his height. I quickly followed his lead and jumped the fence. We both walked deeper and deeper into the forest.

“Alright then this is good and deep enough” Ryan said with one hand on his hip

“Good, I’m glad that little walk is over I’ve stepped on like twelve stones getting here” I stated lifting up my foot.

“You’ll get use to them. Now then time to demonstrate” he said as he raised both his hands up in front of his face. No more then a second later his nails grew an inch longer and pointed. “Now you”

“Excuse me? You want me to do that with my nails… just like that?” I questioned

“Yea it really isn’t really hard at all. All you have to do is imagine your nails growing like this and it’ll just happen. Do it now please” He said as he picked at his feline like teeth. I looked at his nails for a second then I turned my attention to mine and I about it and then my nails quickly grew as long as his. But mine seemed slightly thicker then his.

“Well… okay this is definitely a thing. Now what?” I asked

“If you want to get a hang of this I suggest you start climbing trees” he said as he jumped onto a nearby tree, hooking on bark with his nail on both his hands and feet. “Like so. Lizards and cats climb trees all the time so this very easy for us”

Well I might as well not question him for once and climbed up. I hooked onto the trees pretty easily like he said. I started to climb up; he followed me through his tree. We both eventually made it up to the top of our respective trees.

“Well hot damn, I can climb trees with ease. This will be useful in my future” I said sarcastically looking at my hands.

“You know sarcasm hurts. But besides the nails were naturally stronger and faster then normal humans. So if you ever get into a fight with a normal person be careful because you’ll probably kill them. Fighting is something you should avoid anyway. Just stay out of sight and you’ll cause no trouble” Ryan said as he sat on a tree branch.

“I don’t plan on fighting anybody, with this new found information I just plan on living my life… in fear.” I responded.

“Living in fear just like me, nice. We both stand on common ground and we both know about this. So lets make a pact to stay as quite about this to anyone that’s not a crossbreed, you tell everyone that your slit eyes were just contacts that you’ve worn for years for the fun of it also you should tell people that you told that your eyes were real that you were lying. Just try your best with this tomorrow I don’t want you getting killed” Ryan said.

“Wow thanks for worrying about me, I’m glad you care” I said with a smile “you know you’re a lot more... approachable then other people let on.” I said.

“People talk about me? What what’s wrong with me?” He asked.

“Dude you wore headphones with duck taped cat ears attached to them freshman year” I explained

“Those cat ears were amazing sir and you know it, you just didn’t realize it”

“Ha okay whatever you say dude” I said with a smirk.

After that comment Ryan made a weird expression and tilted his head at me. I could tell he was thinking about something.

“What? Is there a problem?” I asked

“Luke… you’re my friend correct? We only just met today” he asked pointing at me

“Well… I guess were friends yea, you seem like the type of guy I can get along with” I said

“Well great, just amazing. So since we’re friends let talk about something else besides our… well differences” he said.

“With the way you’re talking it seems like you don’t have many friends” I said with smile as I leaned a bit forward on the tree branch.

“You’re right about that, not many people talk to me. People actually tend to avoid me, just like you” Ryan said with a straight face. So naturally at that comment I just looked at him and stayed quiet “Did I say something that upset you?”

“Okay we’ve both been alone lets just drop this subject and pick something else” I thought for a few seconds and then I continued “that girl that you said that goes to our school, the one who wants us to join that little group. What’s her name and what’s she like?” I asked curiosity.

“She’s a whore!” he bellowed

“Wait what? She sleeps around?” I asked

“Well no she’s not actually a whore at all. I just call people I don’t like a whore so…” Ryan said

“Okay glad to know that. So her name is?” I continued

“Britney Fare, she has haze brown hair that she wears in some kind of weird bun, all I’ve seen her wear are either overalls or suspenders with a white shirt. She’s taller then both of us which isn’t saying much considering I’m sort and you’re barley taller then average height”

“Thank you” I said sarcastically.

“And those buck teeth! That bunny like buck teeth and that smile, that freaking creepy smile she does I swear to god that’ll give you nightmares… or wet dreams if that’s what you’re into” Ryan said shrugging.

“No Ryan, I’m not into girls with rabbit teeth” I responded with a blank stare

“Good, that’s good we don’t want here seducing you with her teeth or her powerful legs or her big soulless eyes that peer into your very being” Ryan went on

“Wow you really must dislike her” I said

“Not her just the bunnies those floppy eared bastards…” Ryan persisted

“Okay, well then that’s kind of funny” I said getting up from the tree branch. It supported my weight so I stood up on it “this little chat was fun and educational but I have to get going. You know, home” I said pointing in the direction of my house.

“Oh alright” he said as he also stood up on his branch “guess I’ll see you tomorrow at school. We have the same lunch time so why don’t we meet during lunch?” He asked putting both hands behind his back still keeping his balance with relative ease.

“Oh sure definitely, shake on it?” I asked as I raised my hand for him to shake in good faith.

He looked at my hand for a second and then shock it “alright then Luek I’ll see you tomorrow”

“Okay your just saying my name like that just to piss me off and let me tell you: it’s only working slightly. Now I got to go see you” I said as I Dropped down onto the trunk of the tree and walked out from were I came and jumped the fence. From there I walked home. I quickly got to my room, toke off my shirt and fell right into my bed. I've had a long day, I find out that I'm a crossbreed: a special type of person with attributes of a certain type of animal species, the government wants to kill me and a certain group wants me to become apart of them to help fight the government. So much has happened today. I think I deserve to skip out on doing my geometry homework and go to sleep at six o' clock, and so I did.

When the time came my alarm sounded and crawled out of my bed, I hopped into the shower. After I got out I dried off every part of my body but my black hair. I liked having it wet and hanging slightly in my face, It's just what I like to do. I got my cloths on and left for school, I watched my surroundings for anything odd or any bunnies, but in the end I saw nothing. I finally got to school and ten minutes before it even started. I had time so I might as well look for Ryan in the time I have. So i walked to the spot I would normally see him sitting before school: on one the tables in front the cafeteria. But when I arrived there I didn't see him, strange I always see him sitting around here before school, where is he? Just then I felt someones hand on my shoulder.

"Hmm?" I said as I turned around to see a girl slightly talker then me, she wore a plain white shirt, blue jeans and suspenders.

"Looking for Ryan?" she asked with eerie smile which revealed her buck teeth "I think he's still avoiding me and not listening to word I say. But maybe you will listen to reason"

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
Pinkiegirl13
Review
Pinkiegirl13 wrote a review Review · Jun 20, 2014

Hi, truealpha. This is pinkie here for a review to help YWS. I hope this review made you happy. Anyway, let's get started. *puts on funny glasses*

To say, I love this story. It is very interesting. The chapter is very enjoyable to read this chapter. I love how you bring more descriptions into the paragraphs. It made me lured in the chapter and wanted to read more. It is very well-written. I love it very much. I hope to read more. I love to see the arrival of chapter five. Have a nice day.

Awesome Job! :D

Cheers

Your reviewer, Pinkiegirl13

oh wow thank you from the review :)

User avatar
Asteria
Review
Asteria wrote a review Review · Jun 19, 2014

After reading the preceding chapters of this series, let me start by saying you've improved tenfold in your overall structure, grammar and spelling! The difference is night and day from your first chapter to this one, and I'm thoroughly enjoying watching your improvement while getting to know these characters further.

Now, while you have improved, there are still a few areas that need further work:
-Punctuation: In some instances, you leave it off completely, while other times you put extra in, having periods where there should be commas, or where it's not yet needed. The trick that I generally do is reading it aloud for where natural pauses and endings are found; If you have to read too long without taking a necessary break and it rambles, there's likely to be a period or comma missing somewhere.
-Capitalization: This goes along with your punctuation. There are some instances, especially after you've had dialogue and a quote is ending, that you've a habit of capitalizing things that don't need it. I expect that, with a little more work on the punctuation, the capitalization will, too, fall into place.
-Dialogue: Some of the dialogue itself feels forced. I'm uncertain if this is a stylistic choice, to have it read almost...campy at times, but some of it feels like it needs to be a bit updated, or perhaps matured?

Not to be focused on, though, I want to reiterate that I love how you're breaking up your paragraphs and dialogue now. Before it felt dense, daunting in its huge "wall of text" appearance. Now, it flows nicer, reads far easier on the eyes. It's a pleasure to read through what you've written instead of feeling like I'm muddling through.

I hope that this review isn't taken as too harsh or rambling as it wasn't my intention. Those are just the areas that stood out to me that needed a little TLC.

I look forward to seeing your next installment!

Best wishes,
-Asteria

well thank you for the review, I'm glad to see that I'm improving.



You may deem me romantic, my dear sister, but I bitterly feel the want of a friend.
— Mary Shelley, Frankenstein