You know what?

Hi PoeToaster,
TS here reviewing on a lovely review day.

Your piece was very emotional indeed. It had very strong vocab and definitely told us how you felt. It had good imagery as you described this other person, it held meaning and made an impact. Unfortunately though, it wasn't poetry. I didn't mind this piece, but it looks like you took apart a paragraph and put the lines beneath one another - in that there was no rhythm. You had conviction and confidence in writing this, that was clear to everyone. You had ideas and you brought them in well. You had a very nice word choice, as I mentioned above, so the piece was well decorated. But there was no flow; the flow is the essence of all poetry. It has to drag us in and pull us along at a constant pace through the channels of your mind; it's unimaginably powerful, and your 'poem' lacks this. It puts you at such a disadvantage when you don't include some type of rhythm.

This is something you definitely have to work on; I'm not saying you need a rhyming scheme but it definitely has to gain some flow. Read some of the top poems on this and you'll notice that every one of them maintain a constant flow.

I hope I helped you here, PoeToaster.
Keep Writing.

Yours in ink,
The Shauzer.

Hi!
I really enjoyed the flow and message of the poem. There were just a few things I wanted to point out:

I used to cry, more than i do these days. (Always re-read your work, and you will catch mistakes like not capitalizing you I.)

IT STILL HURTS. (I do not think it adds to the poem by putting this in all caps. You could however, add a period at the end of every word: It. Still. Hurts. Or you could italicize the phrase.

That's right. (I don't think this adds to your poem at all. Try reading it without this phrase and see if you like it better.)

And you know what? ( I was waiting for the phrase it still hurts after this line. )

I remember exactly when I stopped caring about whatever prideful thoughts ran through your hideous mind. (This is really long maybe try breaking it up by putting it like this:

I remember when I stopped caring
about your prideful thoughts,
the thoughts that ran graciously through your hideous mind.

Just an example; re-write anyway you please )

. . .(The ... adds nothing to your poem. It breaks the flow and energy of your piece.)

Now I just laugh, because I'm my biggest fear too. (Why is this funny?)

Your hideous, icy glare may sting... (This was my favorite line, very descriptive! But, I would get rid of the ... here also.)

Thanks for the read, and keep up the awesome writing!
xoxo,
Rascalover

Hii.

I felt so touched by this because, well, it was extremely true. I had a best friend all throughout last year. Now this girl was the type of person you could go to. She was super short, but super sweet...at least I thought so. This person cyber bullied me over the summer. She called 'fake, whore, bitch, slut' the usually. And then she started to say things like, 'you're a horrible person, you should go drug yourself' ect. She never really insulted my body image, not including the whole slut/whore thing (I was not a either of those things, I wear t-shirts that have Pikachu on them *snaps fingers*) or told me to die, so it was a different type of cyber bully. The line, You're supposed to be here for me, not looking down at me, really touched me.

Nitpicks:

I used to cry, more than i do these days. (Capital I)

but now it's just thrown in with the disturbing sludge that stirs around within me. (You've got 2 spaces between 'but' and 'now')

That's literally all the major things I see. You did good at looking over it for the most part, I would just suggest really looking at the capital I's. I found 2. I'm not sure why we have to capitalize them, but it's a grammar law, so do it, or get arrested by the grammar police.