Warning: This work has been rated 16+.
I held the glass that I was about to throw at the wall shakily in my hands. Just moments ago I felt like I could tear down the entire world but now it was like all time had stopped and my-my real world stood before me. Her eyes were puffy and red rimmed like she had been crying and I watched her twirl her fingers into the hem of her shirt over and over again. Just twisting the fabric into little ringlets and then letting it go to just start all over. My wolf growled inside me, furious. He wanted to rush over to her and rip her from the ground she stood on. It took everything in my control to stay exactly where I was. I couldn’t afford any rash decisions again. I couldn’t scare her.
Hell, this was all because of her. That was an undeniable fact. She had changed me, she was everything I could think of right now and everything I didn’t want to think of. Somewhere in the pit of my stomach I could still feel my anger towards her, no-my wolfs anger, bubbling away untamed and hungry. But I knew it wasn’t her fault. She didn’t ask for any of this. I don’t think I even asked for this either, when I begged the goddess for a mate to help me run Bluehaven I thought she would give me someone more… well just more. More like me, like my family, like my pack. Not some teenage girl who had no idea who she was or what she was capable of.
“Oh my goddess Jack, look at what you’ve done.”
My mother’s shrill voice filled the room, she barged her way past Melody and dropped to her knees as she started to haphazardly pick up the mess of bar glass that littered the floor. I spared her just a moment's glance before fixing my gaze back on my mate. She looked both petrified yet sure of herself, like she knew who she was and where she was meant to be at this exact moment and still like that little girl I found lost in the woods. That’s when I noticed the slight golden glow to her eyes, her wolf. Somehow she had shown up and I had no idea. I couldn’t sense her like I could back in the woods. I could feel Melody, could feel our bond pulling me closer to her, but I couldn’t feel her wolf. That was weird. Something was going on with her and I had to figure out what it was.
A soft apology. Words that I could have missed if I wasn’t so intently focused solely on her. The glass in my hand dropped to the floor, causing my mother to yelp in shock. I cocked my head, straining to hear past my mothers complaining. Did I hear her right?
“What?” Great, now I sounded like an idiot.
“I’m sorry. Really.” She said again, turning her head to avoid looking at me. I could see the tears begin to roll down her cheeks again and it made my body tremble, and not in a good way.
I walked towards her, slowly. I didn’t want to scare her anymore then I knew I already had and I was also trying to avoid my mother who was picking her way through my room. Of course she would be more concerned with appearances at a time like this then what was actually happening right in front of her. The closer I got to Melody, the further she shied away. Her fingers picked up their speed as they continued to pick at her shirt. I could smell her scent now, its sweet vanilla aroma snuffing out whatever anger was left inside me. I wanted to reach out and grab her hands, to hold them steady in mine but I was confused. She shouldn’t be the one apologizing. That was supposed to be me. I was the one who overreacted, I should have gracefully explained what she was, what we all were but I didn't. I threw her straight into the deep end without warning back in the clearing and I was the one who let their emotions get the better of them.
“You don’t have to apologize, little one, I do.” I whispered back, too afraid to raise my voice even a fraction of an inch.
She looked at me now, golden eyes and everything. Yes, her wolf was definitely there. I watched as her eyebrows scrunched up while she searched my face. The bond tugged at me, urging me to reach for her and for a moment I felt my hand lift from my side but I forced it back. I couldn’t be too rash this time. I learned my lesson. A dark, uncontrollable lesson. I had to take it slowly. It was what was for the best.
“But I made you angry.”
Again, another soft declaration. Even though I was right in front of her I had to strain my ears to hear it. “Why do you say that?”
“Because I- I could feel it.” Tears. Those bastard drops slowly rolling down her face.
Damint. Of course she could feel my emotions. Especially when they had been so strong. It was an effect of the bond we shared and I knew that. A lump of guilt lodged itself in my throat. How could I have been so stupid to let it get the better of me, especially when now she would be able to feel everything I felt so fiercely. My mother used to tell me about it, how she could feel my fathers rage and also his passion. How it became a crutch she used when she needed to know which version of him she was going to encounter. She used to tell me that because of it, she knew when to avoid him or when to find him. I had always promised myself that when I met my mate I would try my hardest to keep the emotions that were anything but pleasant in check so she would never have to feel the way my mother did. Yet here I was. Being apologized to, for something she had to endure because she thought she caused it.
“She did though Jack. She should feel our anger, she should know what it means to mess with us.”
My wolf growled in my mind. He was itching at that dark spot of my mind again, the place that even to me felt cold and full of hate. But I ignored him as best I could. He was wrong. Not at everything, but certainly at this. He just didn’t understand. I mean how could he. I may have found my mate but I don’t think he had found his yet. Except for that one moment nights earlier, in the woods where I found her, her wolf has not contacted mine. I knew that, I could feel it now. Could feel his frustration as he tried to communicate with her. But she was here, her wolf. I was looking into her gorgeously golden gaze, I could smell her. Why couldn’t he?
“No Melody.” I said, finally letting myself reach up to brush a curl from her face. “You do not need to apologize for that, I am the one who should be sorry. Correction, I am sorry, so deeply sorry. You should never have been able to feel that and even though you did you must know that it wasn’t your fault.”
I prayed that she couldn’t feel the lie that burned my lips. Of course she was the reason I was angry, she was the reason my wolf wanted to rip out the throats of everyone in this room. Yet, she was innocent. Merely sticking up for herself after I made the horrible mistake of grabbing her and forcing her back to me. She was still a person, a child to our world and I could only imagine what it must have been like for her. To wake up in a strange home so far away from her family and be told that she was a wolf and my mate. Oh shit, I completely forgot about the family part. They must be worried sick about her. It’s been what, three days, they were probably tearing down the woods searching for her.
If somehow they made it through the forest all the way to the pack then we would be utterly screwed. My father, grandfather and his father before him worked so hard to keep our existence a secret from the humans that inhabited our lands it would be just my luck to blow it all now. Panic started to claw at my insides and I strained to keep it buried far enough away so my mate couldn’t feel that too. I had to do something quick. It was dumb to bring her here, she needed to get back to her family. But I didn’t want to let her go, not now that I had found her. What the hell am I supposed to do in a situation like this?
Her voice, her soft timid voice, drew me back to her with its melodic sound. I looked at her face, my eyes meeting hers and I swear in that moment I could have melted at her feet. The golden glow of her eyes was gone now, replaced with a warm honey brown that reminded me of summer sunsets and long nights. She was perfect.
“Yes,” I whispered, my hand still lingering on her cheek.
“You went somewhere just now, is everything ok?”
“It is now my little one”
I could feel myself getting distracted in her gaze. The commotion around us fading into absolute nothingness. But just as suddenly as the bliss appeared it vanished. My wolf broke through the barrier I made enough to tear away the first moment of peace I had felt since I took the Alpha position. He growled at me harsh words that turned my stomach. He reminded me that we needed to get her home and that we still needed to figure out why she didn’t know about her lineage or why we still couldn’t feel her wolf. He was right, this time. Everything wasn’t ok. It was far from it.