Cover art for Shadow's Rising {Wing 1} Chapter 4

Shadow's Rising {Wing 1} Chapter 4

by dragonight9

Published January 24, 2024

12+

In Shadow's Rising Wing 1

Chapter 4

Jarid walked over to arena four. It was a large circle of sand that had been cordoned off by a knee-high rope. When he arrived, Jarid noticed another boy approaching who he presumed would be his opponent.

He had an athletic build with jet-black hair and a cocky smile. His shirt looked like grey silk and had his family crest embroidered on it in gold. Jarid recognised him as the first one who ran the obstacle course.

The boy looked Jarid up and down with a smirk.

“Not a bad show on the obstacle course, peasant. I bet you think you can fight pretty good. But don’t get ahead of yourself. I would have made it to the end too if that hay bale had swung where it was supposed to. And while you were rolling in the mud as a child, I was honing my skills with the great Sir Horace,” He stated proudly with his hands on his hips.

Jarid had no idea who Sir Horace was, but he politely nodded anyway. “Good for you.”

The boy frowned, but before he could say anything the official referee walked up to them.

“Ok, boys. Your fight is about to begin. Once you have exchanged names and shaken hands, you will enter the arena and I will explain the rules.”

Both boys stepped forward and shook hands.

“My name is Jarid Drakoulis.”

“Mine is Dominic Ramlock, son of Dorian Ramlock, lord of Delbont,” Dominic replied pridefully.

Jarid had seen Delbont on a map once. It was a large city much farther inland and probably one of the biggest in the country. Most people might have been impressed by the son of such a powerful lord but, to Jarid, he was just another prideful noble flaunting his power.

As they stepped into the arena, Jarid noticed Dominic wiping off the hand he had used to shake Jarid's using his shirt. This slightly irritated him, but he was more concerned by the ramifications of hurting the bratty noble. If he accidentally broke Dominic’s arm or gave him a black eye, the nobility might punish his whole family.

As Jarid thought this, he could picture Shadow rolling his eyes at such a comment.

You must be pretty confident if you’re worried about hurting them more than about getting hurt yourself,” he would say.

Jarid frowned. It’s not like he was arrogant. He just couldn’t help it. Targets and thick-skinned dragons were one thing. But an ordinary human was very different.

The crowds in the stands quieted as the officials for each of the four arenas started explaining the structure of the event.

“The rules are as follows. You will fight until one of you either concedes defeat, leaves the arena or I feel that sufficient damage has been delt. It will be the first to win three rounds. No magic or dirty tricks, such as kicking sand in your opponent’s face, are permitted.” The referee glanced meaningfully at Jarid as he said the last part.

“Are you ready?”

Dominic nodded with a smirk, but Jarid raised his hand.

“Yes?” the referee asked, with a hint of annoyance.

“Will there be any repercussions if one of us seriously harms our opponent?”

Dominic burst out laughing at this. “Are you really that scared to face me? Don’t worry. I would never fight a peasant like you seriously.”

The referee glared disapprovingly at Dominic. Then he turned to Jarid.

“You will not face any repercussions. We have medical teams ready in case anyone is seriously injured.”

Jarid nodded.

“Any more questions?”

“No sir.”

“Good.” The referee raised a hand to each fighter. “Ready?”

Jarid and Dominic both gave their affirmation. The referee dropped both his hands.

“Fight!”

Jarid immediately sank into his ready stance. Low and on his toes with his hands up in front of him, palms facing his opponent. Dominic smirked.

“What’s with that stance peasant? Are you trying to copy an actual fighter? Your pathetic stance means nothing if no one taught you how to use it!”

Dominic rushed forward and started throwing punches like a boxer. He threw three jabs with his right, then faked a left hook, before throwing a right hook with a big, condescending smile.

Jarid deflected the first three jabs with his hands. Knocking them just far enough to the side that they would miss. His right hand raised to block the left hook, but something in Dominic’s eyes made him suspicious. As soon as the right hook started Jarid could tell Dominic was putting all his strength behind this attack.

Now was the time to counter.

Using his left hand Jarid blocked with the back of his hand before grabbing Dominic’s wrist on the inside. Then, using his momentum, Jarid turned and threw Dominic over his shoulder, slamming him to the ground on his back.

“Ack!” Dominic cried in pain as the air was driven from his lungs. Jarid hesitated for a second to see if the ref would call it, but hearing nothing he raised his fist.

“Halt! The first round is over. Return to your side of the arena.”

Jarid barely stopped himself in time. Then he got up and stepped back cautiously in case Dominic tried to attack him from the ground. But Dominic merely laid there wheezing.

Jarid returned to his side and, after a minute to catch his breath, Dominic returned to his.

Jarid could see the rage in his face after being humiliated like that. Jarid took a deep breath and shook out his arms and legs. The nerves were making his skin tingle.

That was intense! It was over so quickly. I barely had time to think! I can’t let my guard down. He probably just underestimated me. I doubt he’s going to play around this time.

The referee looked at both combatants then raised his hand. “Second round… begin!”

Dominic rushed at him again, but this time his first two jabs were followed by a kick. Jarid barely dodged the kick but had to step back. Dominic continued to throw short, fast punches and the occasional kick. Jarid continued retreating slowly as he deflected or dodged the attacks.

Jarid’s style had always been focused on avoiding hits while waiting for his opponent to leave a clear opening. Unfortunately, he hadn’t seen a single one so far, but his opponent couldn’t last forever. Soon Dominic started to tire. His punches came slower, and his stance was starting to waver. He was growing more frustrated as time went on, but recognised Jarid’s strategy and stepped back to recover.

“Ha! Not so… proud now… are you? Is dodging… all you can do?” Dominic taunted between breaths.

Jarid didn’t react to the taunt. His face showed nothing but focus and determination. He walked steadily towards his opponent. Not giving him space to recover.

“Rrrrrgh. Stop being so dauntless, fool!” Dominic growled before launching into another attack.

This time Jarid caught his kick and held his foot in the air. Jarid felt the corners of his mouth twitch upward slightly. When Jarid caught Shadow’s hind leg he still had to worry about his tail, but against a human…

Dominic jumped and twisted to try and kick Jarid while freeing his caught leg, but Jarid was able to dodge the kick and catch his other leg. Now with both of Dominic’s legs securely in his grip Jarid began dragging Dominic to the edge of the arena.

Dominic tried to reach Jarid or break his grip. Twisting and flopping about like a fish while growling curses at him. Jarid brought him to the edge of the arena then swung him around. After gaining sufficient momentum, Jarid tossed him out of the arena.

“Second round, over!”

Dominic got up, trembling with rage, and stomped back to his side of the arena. This time he didn’t say a word. He simply waited until the referee started the third round.

“Do you need a break before we start the third round?” The referee asked.

“Just start the stupid round already! I want to crush this peasant.” Dominic hissed, wiping his sweat covered forehead with the hem of his shirt. The once pristine grey silk was now closer to dark brown from sand and sweat.

“Very well. Third round… begin!”

This time Dominic came at Jarid slowly. His aura of anger was making Jarid slightly nervous. If Dominic was able to get past his defenses, it was going to hurt.

Dominic walked up to Jarid shaking out his arm. For some reason it looked like his arm was loose. Relaxed even. Then he drew back his arm and stepped forward. Jarid tensed up, ready to block.

Suddenly he was falling backward, his mouth sore. Only now did Dominic’s punch register in his mind. It had been like a whip. His fist only moved at the last second. Jarid didn’t even have time to realise it had started moving, much less block it.

As Jarid’s back hit the sand he heard gasps from the crowd. They were all muttering about something called a viper’s blow, but he couldn’t make out the details.

“Halt! Round three, over!”

Jarid looked up to see Dominic’s disdainful look as he turned his back on Jarid and retreated to his side.

Jarid pulled himself to his feet and rubbed his chin. Most people might have been scared or angry after receiving such a blow, but Jarid was feeling excited. He had never seen a technique like that before! He wanted to know how it worked so he could try it himself. Just thinking about using such a technique made him want to grin, but now was not the time. Jarid quickly got up and readied himself for the next round.

“Fourth round! Ready… begin!”

Dominic walked forward again. Jarid backed away until he was right at the edge of the arena. The instant his back was against the arena edge, Dominic stepped in and drew back his arm. Jarid knew he couldn’t react fast enough to block. All he could do was predict where he was going to strike.

Jarid could see in his eyes that Dominic was going to strike him in the face again. This time Jarid put his arms together and blocked rather than trying to deflect the blow.

“Ah!” Dominic cried, as his blow connected with Jarid’s toughened forearms. Dominic instinctively shook out his hand to relieve the pain and Jarid seized the opportunity to grab Dominic’s other hand. Then he rolled onto his back pulling Dominic down with him. Taken by surprise Dominic fell forward. Jarid planted his foot in Dominic’s gut and catapulted him over his head and out of the arena.

“Round four over! The match goes to Jarid Drakoulis!” the referee announced.

Jarid stood and breathed a sigh of relief while wiping the sweat from his brow. His legs were a little shaky from nervousness, but he had done it! He did feel a little bad for his opponent though. Losing to him probably lessened Dominic’s chances of going to the academy. Jarid quickly walked over to him.

“Good fight! That punch you used was amazing! Could you show me how you did that sometime?” Jarid said, offering him a hand up.

Dominic slapped the hand aside and glared at Jarid.

“Certainly. I’ll show it to you when I use it to break your nose,” He muttered sarcastically. “Get out of my way.” He shoved Jarid aside as he stormed off.

Jarid shrugged inwardly. He should have guessed this would be Dominic’s response, but he still felt bad about humiliating him. Maybe he could try to apologize next time they met, but for now there wasn’t much he could do.

Jarid walked back to the side of the arena and sat down to watch the end of Steven’s fight.

His opponent was a bit taller and much more muscular. Steven seemed to be using his speed to keep away from his opponent’s attempts to grapple him, while delivering quick jabs whenever he could.

Jarid could see the frustration evident on the sweat covered face of Steven’s opponent. Finally, Steven stopped evading and stood in place waiting for his opponent. Seeing his chance, the more muscular fighter launched at Steven to grab him. Steven calmly stepped to the side, then jabbed his opponent in the side so fast Jarid barely saw his hand connect.

His opponent’s body twisted like he’d been stung, arms instinctively dropping to his side to stop the pain. This left him wide open for Steven’s left hook, which connected solidly with his jaw. Steven followed up with a right hook, but his opponent was already slumping to the ground.

The referee of the match proclaimed Steven the winner. Steven helped his opponent to his feet and they both shook hands. As Steven exited the arena, he noticed Jarid and jogged over to see him.

“Hey Jarid! That guy was pretty good, am I right? We were going even on wins, but I pulled it off in the end. Just barely though. Could have gone either way honestly. I suppose I was just lucky, ha, ha.” Steven sat down next to Jarid with a proud smile.

Jarid couldn’t tell if Steven was trying to be humble or exaggerating his opponent’s strength, but it hadn’t looked like Steven was ever in trouble during his fight. In fact, he wasn’t even sweating at all. Jarid nodded and tried to force a smile, but quickly looked away to hide how obviously fake it was.

Why do nobles always have to make it seem like they’re so great? All they ever seem to care about is their own image. Nobody else matters. They wouldn’t even think to ask-

“So how did your fight go? Did you win any rounds?”

Jarid was pulled from his ruminations by Steven’s words. Jarid glanced over in surprise and found Steven’s eyes alight with genuine curiosity.

First, Jarid felt a deep sense of confusion as his thoughts from just a moment before were contradicted. It was such perfect timing that Jarid wondered if Steven had mind reading powers like Shadow, but he quickly dismissed the thought.

Secondly, he was crushed by guilt as he remembered Airel’s words from the night before. He thought that he had changed after realising that he couldn’t judge someone just because they were nobility. But in reality, it wasn’t that easy. Maybe that’s why it was so hard for humans and dragons to change what they believed about each other.

Then Jarid realised he had neglected to respond to Steven’s question.

“Oh, yeah. I won.” Jarid replied flatly. On the outside his face was blank but inside his mind was in turmoil.

What kind of an answer was that? I don’t know. I was still processing how embarrassing it was to think about Steven that way after believing I was such an open-minded person. Didn’t have time to figure out how to word it. Well, it’s too late to fix it now! I bet he thinks I’m stupid now.

Jarid’s embarrassment grew as he continued to berate himself for his awkwardness. Thankfully Steven didn’t seem to notice.

“You won?! That’s amazing! I must admit, I never imagined a commoner would have that kind of skill. You certainly know how to impress my friend! I can’t wait to get to know you. I have a feeling there is a lot more to you than meets the eye.”

Jarid couldn’t help but look down shyly at the compliment. “Thank you.”

Then the announcer called everyone’s attention once more.

“Well done everyone! We will now be moving on to our final test. This will test your ability to use magic. An essential part of being a dragon rider. I wish you all good luck.”

Jarid stood and pushed aside his feelings. He needed to focus. This was his last chance to impress the instructors from the academy. His last chance to prove he was worthy of becoming a dragon rider.

Comments & reviews · 5
User avatar
ArchieArts
Review
ArchieArts wrote a review Review · Dec 15, 2025

I really liked this chapter! I think it's intresting to have Jarid beat the cocky Dominic in the first two rounds, but quickly be beaten in the third. This adds some mystery to what move Dominic had used, with whispers of "Viper's Fist," which is a cool and completly accurate name for a move so fast. I also like how that Jaird had adapted in the last round, instead of trying to deflect it again, which is a nice touch. During Steven's match, at least the part mentioned, seems that it would be pretty intersting, and adding on to Steven as a character. This adds some wonder onto Steven's capabilities in combat and stratagy.

User avatar
Kaia
Review
Kaia wrote a review Review · Sep 17, 2024

Heyo! I have returned! :D
Let's see. It looks like my first suggestion here would be to try to limit the number of "has" and "had" incidences that I'm seeing. You mentioned that what I'm reviewing currently is a little outdated so that makes sense that that wouldn't be the best here. But just when you next look it over, maybe try to cut some of that.

Also, wow! His opponent must have wiggled into an extra set of clothes after falling into the mud during the last chapter!

And while you were rolling in the mud as a child, I was honing my skills with the great Sir Horace,” He stated proudly with his hands on his hips.
So this boy is older than Jarid I take it. And, my, does his personality shine through in his condescending tone toward Jarid. I already want to slap the boy across the face but I suppose I should have expected it because there was a lot of foreshadowing that the nobles would be particularly unkind to Jarid.

The boy frowned, but before he could say anything the official referee walked up to them.
oh, that was not what he was expecting! He wanted to make Jarid mad so badly! Great job not reacting to it, Jarid. Hold your ground!

Ok boys
comma between these two.

I love how you included Dominic's whole lineage in how he responded while Jarid only states the basic fact: his name. Oooh I'm definitely favoring the much better behaved Jarid in this fight!

they stepped into the arena Jarid noticed Dominic wiping his hand on his shirt
Comma between "arena" and "Jarid." Also, I'm not QUITE sure what is irritating Jarid about Dominic's behavior. Is Dominic trying to bring attention to the family colors or badge on his shirt?

Also, I didn't even think about the whole family revenge problem. Jarid is clearly in a tight spot. He's gotta defeat this kid WITHOUT injuring the boy. But I think Shadow is right:

Jarid thought this he could picture Shadow rolling his eyes at such a comment.

“You must be pretty confident if you’re worried about hurting them more than about getting hurt yourself,” He would say.
(comma between "this" and "he." Also you don't need to capitalize "he" at the end.)

The referee glanced meaningfully at Jarid as he said the last part.
even the referee is against him! T0T

I actually really liked that Jarid asked that question about the repercussions for hurting the other. It's such an honest question. It also was just the right amount of unexpected that it nicely breaks up the "ready set go" type of situation this scene is built around.

Ack!” Dominic cried in pain as the air was driven from his lungs. Jarid hesitated for a second to see if the ref would call it, but hearing nothing he raised his fist.

“Halt! The first round is over. Return to your side of the arena.”

Jarid barely stopped himself in time. Then he got up and stepped back cautiously in case Dominic tried to attack him from the ground. But Dominic merely laid there wheezing.
You did a spectacular job describing the fight. I don't have any real suggestions but perhaps making the sentences a little shorter toward the end to keep the momentum of the fight going. Quick points on punctuation. I would just search for "peasant" and make sure to have a comma before each time Dominic calls him that. You may also consider capitalizing "peasant" as that is a direct address to Jarid. Also, when "then" is used at the beginning of a sentence, be sure to add a comma after it.

In the quoted text, I suggest writing out referee instead of just "ref" because that sounds maybe a touch too informal? Use a comma before "wheezing" which is such a great way to describe the opponent's breathing.

Jarid took a deep breath and shook out his arms and legs. The nerves were making his skin tingle.
this was a really great detail i wanted to highlight.

The way you did Dominic's return taunt with him panting was so realistic, I could honestly hear him say those words and picture him leaning over, hands on knees, to catch his breath even though those details weren't included in the narrative! Great job!!

I love your description of Dominic trying to "flop" around like a fish. He's going to be MAD so MAD at Jarid when he gets a chance. If these two end up at that academy together, there will be serious problems. I also love the twitch of a smile-a reflection of my own expression upon reading Dominic's second defeat. (Also I love your name choice for Dominic. The "d" at the beginning has a sound that resonates with dominion, confidence. Also the name sounds royal)

Continuing...

The once pristine grey silk was now closer to dark brown from sand and sweat.
I take this as symbolism. Jarid is putting stains on the royal reputation. Clever detail.

Suddenly he was falling backward, his mouth sore. Only now did Dominic’s punch register in his mind. It had been like a whip. His fist only moved at the last second. Jarid didn’t even have time to realise it had started moving, much less block it.

As Jarid’s back hit the sand he heard gasps from the crowd. They were all muttering about something called a viper’s blow, but he couldn’t make out the details.


Whoaaa!! That was literally out of nowhere! What a complete turn around! Your way of describing how sudden it was is absolutely stellar! I thought Jarid might have broken his arm or something the way his arm was just lying like that! Wow!! You put thought into that!

I also love that you didn't let Jarid just throw his companion down again and win time after time. That would be a little too predictable but it was what I was expecting after he did so well before.

But now...the crowd. I didn't see or hear mention of them earlier until they were whispering about the viper so I assumed that it was just the referee, Jarid and Dominic in the arena. Maybe mention some bystanders or something so I can better picture the scene before the whisper of the viper. But great job that aside!!

And grammer. there should be a comma after "sand."

Also mannnnnn!! Jarid is undefeatable. He just stands there so happy to have been defeated by such a cool trick he just wants to grin at that tactic. I love this character so much! I also love how he goes up to Dominic, feeling a genuine sympathy for him probably not getting to go to academy because he lost. And Dominic's angry glare was on point with his personality. And what a quip about using his technique to punch Jarid when he next sees and then teach him how to use it!

Now Stephens fight went a lot better than I expected. I guess not I can picture Stephen being fast. I also picture him now as being a little all the smaller side, but I realize now that I rather wish I could know better what Stephen looked like, especially since now he's becoming an important character.

I did catch the condescending tone in Stephens words. He does think of himself as better than Jarid. I think Jarid shouldn't have told him he wasnt a noble.

I'm still so curious about Stephen. I want to know more. Why is he acting like a friend? I still can't help but feel that Stephen has dark plans in the making but maybe not.

The way you described Jarids awkwardness was great! He's obviously pretty tired and his mind is working against him. But I think he'll be alright as the chapter ends with him concentrating again.

And that's it! Hope this review is helpful!!
-Kaia

I am always grateful for your grammar corrections, and I'll definitely look into mentioning Dominic's shirt/clothes change and the crowd's presence more often.

Thanks so much :)

Kaia replied · Sep 17, 2024

Absolutely! :D

User avatar
Lucian
Review
Lucian wrote a review Review · Mar 20, 2024

Impressive chapter, the fighting scene was incredible. I'm very impressed with the details put into writing this one. The fight was an astonishing one with the fact that a commoner could easily beat a noble. Dominic seems to be a better example of a common noble, if the information from Jared is good to go by. I see the little tidbits from the Wings of Fire series. The arena in "Shadows Rising" is similar to the arena in The Skywing Kingdom, if that is where the inspiration came from, not saying you're copying anything. Just an observation of the fact that someone is finally adding good portions of books to make theirs better. It's amazing that you're taking inspiration from other literature.

For any errors or suggestions, I can't see any errors other than minor grammatical ones. No major suggestions, all I can suggest is making the fight seem longer, along with a person who has never fought another person would have a little more trouble but I can see the rationality of it. Since Jared did fight Shadow for a long time and Shadow is conscious like a human, I can imagine that the fighting would be similar.

Overall, good job on writing this chapter, I'm enjoying reading this story and I hope your inspiration continues. Good luck and may writer's block fly past you, passing you by completely!

So glad you enjoyed. It was so much fun writing the action scene and you might be surprised how quick fights between non-pro fighters can be. (I based this off my own martial arts experience).
I didn't actually notice the Skywing arena comparison but it totally does. When writing this I based it off a mini Roman coliseum.

Lucian replied · Mar 21, 2024

I didn't even think of that comparison, but now I totally see it.

Random avatar
Ravena
Review
Ravena wrote a review Review · Jan 27, 2024

Hello again, my friend!

Finally here to read and review chapter 4, and it did not disappoint!

So, I have to say, Dominic is giving me big Draco Malfoy vibes. Very antagonistic, definitely capturing the "entitled noble" character type, and it feels like if he gets into the academy, he could do a lot to sabotage Jarid. That note about the powerful family being willing to come after Jarid, as well, was also a great addition because it displayed not just how nobles are prejudiced, but also hinted toward how they have the power to act this way. So, very cool character introduction that also provided a little bit of world-building, at least from the way I interpreted it.

And you do a good job at getting the reader to dislike the character, like you did with Scorch in Wing 2. The gloating and the crude remarks were obnoxious enough, but this line was really the shock for me:

"As they stepped into the arena Jarid noticed Dominic wiping his hand on his shirt."

Dude, you can't even shake hands?! Nuts, totally nuts, haha.

On a side note, regarding characters, Steven seems so nice toward Jarid that I almost feel bad about being suspicious of him at first. Especially with Jarid seeming to open up a bit, toward the end, he's seeming more like a potential companion.

And of course, Jarid seemed so balanced and calm, even in the face of Dominic's behavior; he was clearly annoyed, and clearly wanted to prove himself, but he also hesitated even after being reassured by the ref, and he even went as far as to feel bad about humiliating the brat. How very noble of him (in the actual sense of the word, not whatever these divas are haha).

It's also really cool that you added glimpses of Jarid remembering his sparring with Shadow, just to help show where he got this incredible skill from, and it was also nice that you added Jarid thinking about Shadow as he analyzes the situation. I remember Shadow thought a lot about Jarid, so seeing the same here is a nice contrast.

As a mild recommendation, I would italicize that mental quote from Shadow, here:

“You must be pretty confident if you’re worried about hurting them more than about getting hurt yourself,” He would say.

Just because it's technically in Jarid's head, so it's a thought, which are traditionally italicized, and it would also put more of a contrast between it and "current" dialogue -but that's just me, please take that with a grain of salt.

The fight scenes, ah! I am loving these fight scenes! There are lots of details, but it's not *so* detailed that it seems cluttered. It really puts you in the moment, and shows how much Jarid is invested in the battle, like he's watching for every last opportunity he can use. It's a good way to display his power as well, as even the son of a lord trained by a famous name couldn't bring him down.

Overall, great chapter with excellent dialogue, very well-written and full of action. Nicely done! :)

User avatar
PKMichelle
Review
PKMichelle wrote a review Review · Jan 24, 2024

Hello friend!
Here for the next epic chapter!


Per my interpretation, this was an outstanding chapter and a wonderful addition to the novel! Everything was written really well, and it was so action-packed!

Jarid's finally going into the fight, and the only thing he's worried about is whether he'll hurt his opponent. The ref says it's okay if anyone gets hurt, and thus the fight commences. Jarid wins the first two rounds, using his evading skills to his advantage, but those fall short in the third round when he's hit with an intense punch. Luckily for him, he wins the fourth round and takes the overall win, but when meeting back up with Steven, he doesn't feel to great about what he's done. The chapter ends with them preparing for the magic test.

This was an amazing chapter, and it was really fun to read!


If I could offer any sort of advice, I wouldn't! This was absolutely phenomenal, and I didn't notice any grammar or spelling errors. You did a stellar job with this!


If I had to pick my favorite part, it would have to be related to how thoughtful and contemplative Jarid is throughout the chapter! The entire time, he's constantly thinking about others and what he can learn from them.

The first thing that really stood out to me related to Jarid's contemplation came right before the fight. When Jarid was imagining what Shadow might say to him in that moment, you said,

“You must be pretty confident if you’re worried about hurting them more than about getting hurt yourself,” he would say.


This really goes to show how Jarid always has someone else in the back of his mind and how much he cares about their advice and wisdom. This is especially wonderful considering it's his dragon, a being he considers his brother, because it shows how strong their connection is and how important Shadow is to Jarid. I thought this was a really neat way to show their relationship, as well as Jarid's compassion!

The next thing in this chapter that I thought was really cool happened in round three when Dominic hit Jarid incredibly hard with the viper's blow, and all Jarid cared about was how he did it. You said,

Most people might have been scared or angry after receiving such a blow, but Jarid was feeling excited. He had never seen a technique like that before! He wanted to know how it worked so he could try it himself.


This showed just how much Jarid wants to learn and cares about the craft, and it did it in such an awesome way. He literally got punched in the face and was just in awe at the blow. This is a good indication of his character and how respectful and curious he is as a person. He wants to learn even when he's hurt, and that's a really great way to show such an incredible character, so kudos to you for that!

The final thing that really caught my eye in this chapter happened when Steven was inquiring about how Jarid's fight went and you said,

He thought that he had changed after realising that he couldn’t judge someone just because they were nobility. But in reality, it wasn’t that easy. Maybe that’s why it was so hard for humans and dragons to change what they believed about each other.


This is one of the final things Jarid thinks in this chapter, and it truly shows how introspective he really is. Even when there's so much on the line, Jarid stopped to look at himself and who he is as a person. This makes him such a great and loveable character, and I love how you showed this! You did a great job here!


Overall, this was a fantastic chapter, and I genuinely enjoyed reading it! You did an excellent job, and I look forward to the next chapter!

Thank you for taking the time to write and post this, and I hope this review is of some use to you!


Goodbye for now! I hope you have a magnificent day (or night) wherever you are!

I'm so glad you enjoyed :)

I'm so happy to see that Jarid's traits are getting across to my readers. Thanks for the review!



Human minds are more full of mysteries than any written book and more changeable than the cloud shapes in the air.
— Louisa May Alcott