16+ Violence

Henry's story-The adventures of Poppy McLain

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence.

*This story is underneath my folder titled "Adventures of Poppy and others". Gacha Club character designs are under this forum: https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/viewtopic.php?... Enjoy!*

Sixteen year old Henry stared at the bright white walls in the large room he was sitting in.

It wasn't his fault that he was a vampire. That was what Ash told him. Ash used to talk about a lot of things with him when they were little. They had a connection. A mind connection. Henry didn’t know how or why, but he cherished every moment they spent talking to each other through their minds. It was the one good thing in Henry’s life.

Ash was the only friend he could talk to about his parents who hurt him, who hated him because he was not a witch, like them. He was just a boy and so was Ash. Ash trusted him enough to tell him about his missing older sister. They were going to find her together. That was what they promised each other.

But Henry’s parents took him to a strange, hidden place, where a man called “Van Death” in offensively bright colors had poisoned him with a syringe, filled with something that grew out two of his front teeth, made him into a monster, a vampire, a-

The door slid open. Ash walked in, his white lab coat grazing the padded floor. He walked in front of Henry and lifted up his sleeve, revealing his brown wrist, where past dark tooth marks still showed.

“Open your mouth.” Ash said softly.

Henry would not. Ash always drank some kind of poison that would make Henry too weak to run away, to say no. If he drank Ash’s blood, then he would be tired again.

Ash sighed.

“I know you don’t like it, but you have to do it. It’s no use starving yourself. Open your mouth. Don’t make me force you.”

Ash once promised him that they’d run away together. That they’d find Poppy together. That was her name. It was Poppy.

And Ash wasn’t even a human. He knew that the building they were in trapped and hurt monsters. He knew that the monsters were hunted. So why was he working there? Why was he harming Henry? Why…why…

Ash sat down on the ground, his violet eyes steady on Henry’s brown ones. They did not falter away, nor did they seem to blink. Which only meant one thing. He wanted Henry to look at his eyes, not his mouth. He was going to sing and Henry had to shut him up. He had to…he had to…but his eyes…they were beautiful…so beautiful…so glistening…so…so…

“Rest now

Crimson magic will save you

Sweet nectar of all that screams

Open those lips

And don’t deny

What will help you thrive

Bones weary and worn

Never falter away

The sour softness is here to stay”

Ash’s wrist was pressed close to Henry’s mouth, far too late for Henry to be aware. That was the song of the siren. It spoke to inner desires and made the listener weak to the melody. Ash’s blood was decadent and velvety, unlike anything he had ever eaten before as a human. Or maybe it was because he barely got to eat anything at all before he was forced to be a vampire.

One sip of Ash’s blood had Henry’s deepest, darkest subconscious wondering why he would say no in the first place, but when the white lights began to blur around the edges, his body began to remember.

His claws frantically gripped at the padded ground, grasped for Ash, who was getting up-slipping away-leaving him just like he always did.

I’m going to get you out of here one day. You just have to wait.

Henry’s eyelids grew heavy, too heavy to keep fully open. He could only see Ash as he began to close the door, smiling at Henry as he did so, like he was sorry, like he actually felt bad about it.

And some childish, wishful part of him still believed in Ash.

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Tikaya
Review
Tikaya wrote a review · Wed Jun 03, 2026 6:47 am

Good morning~
Figured I read a bit of Poppy today!

Love the design of Van btw (checked the forum link~)

I feel like your first sentence lacks specificity. It’s good that you’re trying to set the scene but especially a “large room” doesn’t really say anything. Maybe you could have hinted at the purpose of the room or the reason why Henry’s in it, through description?

Okay… I should have realized from the name that “Van Death” is probably not the nicest kinda character (and I should have also known from the earlier chapters…) but still, cool design, amiright?^^°

Oh my oh my, I love that you reiterated the relationship that Henry has with Ash before Ash actually shows up in this scene: bc here he’s so cold and clinical and he drinks poison, maybe just to make Henry weak @.@
Especially that is so chilling: “Don’t make me force you.“

Something is not right in this sentence: “He knew that the building they were in trapped and hurt monsters.” Maybe if you get rid of the “and”?

“Why was he harming Henry? Why…why…“ Oh no, poor kid ☹

Hmmm intriguing, this singing (cool lyrics too)

“wondering why he would say no in the first plac” ahhhh oh no ☹ Oh that is such a good phrasing and such a manipulative magic…!

And the final sentence… Ahhhh!!!
I am kinda hoping that Poppy will become the one to fix this situation!

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candyhearts
Review

Hai... again... hehe!!

Wow, this is soooo painful and tense!! I love how the scene is physically quiet, just Henry in a white padded room, Ash entering, but emotionally it feels like everything is screaming. The betrayal here is really strong because Ash isn’t just some random captor. He was Henry’s friend, his mind-connection person, the one good thing in his life, and now he’s become part of the system hurting him... That makes the horror hit way harder. I can't fathom having something like that happen to me with someone I trust!!

I really like the contrast between Ash’s softness and the cruelty of what he’s doing, too ~~ He speaks gently, sits down, sighs, smiles like he’s sorry, but he is still forcing Henry to drink something that weakens him. That’s such an unsettling kind of tenderness!! It feels loving on the surface and monstrous underneath, which makes Henry’s confusion completely believable. I like how you play around with that dynamic throughout this!!

He knew that the building they were in trapped and hurt monsters. He knew that the monsters were hunted. So why was he working there? Why was he harming Henry? Why…why…


Like this!! That's such a painful realization to have, and it's difficult to be stuck between two opposing beliefs/views ~~ He wants to have a job, but he also wants to protect someone he's grown to care about.

The siren song is also such a cool detail, too!! It turns Ash’s control into something intimate and sensory, not just physical. The blood being “decadent and velvety” makes the whole moment feel awful in a really effective way because Henry’s body wants it even when his mind knows it’s a trap. That internal split is crazy in the best way; he is being harmed through comfort, through hunger, through the last person he still wants to trust... Ugh!!

But Henry’s parents took him to a strange, hidden place, where a man called “Van Death” in offensively bright colors had poisoned him with a syringe, filled with something that grew out two of his front teeth, made him into a monster, a vampire, a-


Hmm!! Van Death and the organization are intriguing, but I felt it was very sudden here. The name is striking and almost campy, especially with the “offensively bright colors,” which could absolutely work if this world has that kind of gothic-weird tone. But because the emotional center is so raw and intimate, that detail briefly pulled me out?? Maybe one more concrete detail about that place or the syringe could make it feel more sinister and less abrupt. I don't know much about whether it'll come up in other stories, but I wanted more info here!!

The ending hurts so much though: Henry reaching for Ash as he leaves, while still remembering the promise that Ash would get him out one day, is such a good emotional twist. The vampire element especially was interesting to me, how it works less like flashy monster lore and more like a metaphor for captivity.

Loved this!! Ugh, poor Henry!!

- Payton

I%u2019m so glad you loved this!!!!

More will be expanded upon. <3



To be a master of metaphor is the greatest thing by far. It is the one thing that cannot be learnt from others, and it is also a sign of genius.
— Aristotle, Poetics