I swoop upward
Carving a perfect arc
Headed up to heaven
Headed to perfect skies
Closing my eyes
Sweeping just above the water
Swooping up into the wind
My journey is unknown
Traveling high above
Into the navy sky with
Paint splattered clouds
Twisting upward
Wind streaks back my feathers
Slowly turning back toward the earth
See a longing human
Wishing to fly like me
To the moon at night
To the sun at day
And I look at him
Sadly
Before I soar off
Into heaven
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
I really like this poem. I like how you are swooping up so high and looking down at all the sad humans that aren't as happy is you.
My favourite verse. Good job and keep on writing!
Hey there,
Liked your poem! First off I have a few nitpicks:
Very nice! As sassykat said, great imagery. I liked your perspective, looking down at the human. And your style is beautiful, not too complex, not forced, very stream-of-consciousness. Nice work!
Sare
i liked your poem. it wuz very interesting. keep writing!!
One think to point out: If you are going up, into heaven, what's with the "Swooping Low," part at the beginning? Just a thought. The imagery was great in this piece, a nice read and made me feel good. Awesome job.