A/N: Okay, so I have no idea just yet how to make it clear why he is a monster, but just think about what monsters do and I will find a way to give reason why she thinks of him as such. Thank you for reading. :)
My Monster
BY: Paradox
I don’t have a monster beneath my bed.
He’s not the shy type,
He doesn’t like to hide.
No,
Instead he is lying right beside me,
Filling my head with his voice.
Haunting but familiar,
Familiar, but no longer safe.
Why should he hide?
This place is his home.
Who will come to disturb him?
Certainly not me.
I’m too afraid to do that.
Besides,
I need him right beside me,
My monster.
Because who else will keep me company at night?
Who else will scare the other monsters away?
Certainly not I.
I enjoy their misguided selves too much.
If he were to hide then I would have to as well.
But that’s a big If.
Since my monster has decided
That I am his,
And he is mine.
If he were to hide,
And leave me alone,
Then they would see it as invitation
To take something unowned—
Unwanted.
Won’t let that happen.
Not my monster.
He’s here to protect,
Not to scare.
Though that is inevitable,
Since I am easily frightened,
And disgustingly cowardly.
But somehow he’s okay with that,
My monster.
So I won’t let him go,
And for his sake,
Won’t show my fear.
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Hi Vivian! Catcha01 here with a review.
I absolutely love this poem!!! This made me look at monsters in a totally different light. I was reading it and was like "I want a monster too".
Anyway I found only one nitpick and it was the first line. I think that you mean "a monster" First line can be the most important, giving the reader a large clue to how the rest of the poem may go.
Aside from that your poem was absolutely amazing. You are such an awesome writer and this monster poem was so very amazing. Now I'm going to go like it... done. Really great job!
Keep Writing!
~Catcha01
Thanks, and yes I'll fix that.
I couldn't really feel the meaning in this except for the "monster" was a person and that he was fine with this girl's personalities; like how easily frightened she can get and "disgustingly cowardly". I felt as though this could have been more long between the lines and more in detail. How exactly did he become what you could call a "monster", and did he do anything wrong to be called that?
I don’t have monster beneath my bed.
Do you mean "a monster"?
Can’t let that happen.
Not my monster.
This sounds a little awkward, perhaps you could revise it, like: I can't let that happen, not to my monster, [my one and only monster].
Familiar[,] but no longer safe.
And for his sake,
Won’t show my fear.
I think you meant after "and for his sake" to put an I after that.
Alright thanks for pointing those out. I'll try and be more clear in my revisions.