Hello TypoWithoutCoffee, I hope this finds you well.
First I would like to mention that Greecian cultures and art is a favorite of mine, so I was by all means definitely intrigued. The mention of your "wax-winged brother" pulls me to the story of Icarus and the rashness he possessed to fly towards the sun, laying to the reader the means of saying you could never be so adventurous. This flows towards what I perceive as you trying your best, sometimes achieving what you deemed impossible, and then being handed even more responsibility from a man who you could have seen as more capable.
It is always hard to ask for help, waiting until you feel like you would break from underneath all the pressure and seeing the torment of others so carefree while they watch you shatter. From all of this though, one could maybe learn from that lesson and be free from such burdens, "the world hits the ground swiftly I start running". There will always be an aftermath from when one unsheathes all the burdens that bear them down, but as long as you run away from the shocks, you can leap over any obstacles in your path to find where you truly belong with the feet that help you run.
I did not necessarily find any grammatical errors in this poem, and it was well thought out, played like a story or maybe a dream that you had in fragments.
Keep creating art, and dance in the rain when things seem hard.
Points: 47
Reviews: 12
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