The Voices

Hello there, I really loved reading your poem. I'm new here and I usually write feature articles and science essays, so I'm not very good at writing poems but I want to try though. When I read the first stanza, it told me a lot. There's a lot of emotion and you actually pictured the moment. I hope to read more!:-)

Hello, Yui! I love your avatar... Okay, racket here to review this poem! Wow, So, I really like this. I think anyone could relate to this, in that there's always all those voices around us and inside us telling us what to do and think, and then you mention the music you're using to distract yourself, which I totally get. So, all in all, totally relatable, so good job!
Sooo... I see that you're messing around with your capitalization and things, which is always great, but I don't think the lack of capitalization really fits with this poem. Sometimes it does, like with extremely deep, dark stuff or really innocent things, the extremes. So I don't think it fits all that well with your poem, especially because you're writing in the first person and we always capitalize the 'I's when we talk about ourselves... I dunno, that's probably not a very good reason for putting normal capitalization in, but, to me, it just doesn't seem to fit with the poem. I can't think of how to explain it better.
You use at the beginning of two of your stanzas (really enjoyed your stanzas, by the way) 'but' and 'so', which are those conjoining words that help one thought turn into another. But I'd like to see if you could try and hook the reader in with the last line or so of one stanza, a line that would really connect with the next stanza so that you don't have to use those conjoining words. Those spots where you use 'and's and 'but's and 'so's are huge opportunities for creativity in your writing. You can take out those conjoining words and make them into really interesting lines that pull your reader forward in the poem.
I really like this poem! I can relate completely and that's is always a huge goal for a writer. So good job! I really like the phrasing of everything, especially that one line about concrete cracks. Keep up the great writing! I can't wait to read more of your stuff.
~racket

Hello!
I actually really enjoyed this poem. I think it's something that a lot of people can relate to. All us introverts are nodding along, and I totally understand the need to just drown it all out with something so loud you can't think and so the voices in your head stop. You definitely got that message across.
I think the point of this poem was to convey that message. So, ordinarily with something written in a way like this, I'd ask for more unique phrases and metaphors etc. but because the purpose is the message, I think the clarity works really well. I think you could still go over this with a fine-toothed comb and ask yourself whether you need a particular word or phrase or if it's just redundant-- not that I saw any particular examples of redundancy here, I just know that in poetry less is usually more in terms of word count.
I think you could catch a couple other minor mistakes with punctuation that way too, but I don't want to push anything on you if it was stylistic choice.
I think your formatting and capitalization was fine.
You did a good job in this poem. I really don't have much else to say. I thoroughly enjoyed it.
Let me know if you need any help!
Keep writing!
~fortis

Oh wow!
This is really good and inspiring.
You kept me in suspension till the very end that I really liked.
I think the last part is the most breathtaking one even though I like it as a whole.
I can totally relate to this.
And let me tell you something: If you wrote this during your geometry class, I cannot wait to read what you write during your English or creative writing class.
All the best.