Hello Swag. Jordin here with a review for you and my team so called team hot sauce.
I sure hope this helps you out buddy.
Okay in this chapter you did good but you still have some mistakes such as "Please" You wrote "Plz" and "you're" you wrote "youre" and that is it but you do need to capitalize names.
Cause should be cut out of here.Mary Ann Lou cause her face melted off.
You have a interesting idea of this story.
This is a very bad way to end a story a very very very bad way but you can do it like this it you really want to.THE END
Good job overall interesting ideas.
Keep calm review write read and have some good luck.
Hope this helped you out swag.
~Jon~

Points: 286
Reviews: 241
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