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140,138 Literary Works • 673,032 Reviews
Alrighty there. Hello! I found this poem to be really nice. It's simple, which is refreshing, and you still manage to get some emotion and point across. HOWEVER, the last four lines are a little 'iffy', you might say. I realise there's only so much -ing words you can use, but breaking the rhyming scheme sort of breaks the spell as well. Then again, there isn't much I can suggest for you to substitute it with, so it works good enough as an ending. My favorite lines are "Our hearts/are fusing". I really like how you broke out of the question-answer pattern like that.
Overall, great poem!