Your eyes
Are now small and watery,
Bubbling with energy and excitement,
As you take you very first step.
They are pure and innocent-for the first and last time.
They are full of mirth and joy.
You like all others start as a lovable baby.
Your eyes
Are now full of wild mischief,
Jumping with much-wanted amusement
As you push off the stairs your baby brother,
They are filled with anything but care.
They are hungry for more similar fun.
You are a promising imp.
Your eyes
Are now darting this way and that,
As you cheat from your best friend’s paper,
They know nothing but the tricks of cheating.
They are cunningly trained to suit.
You are an ever-growing cheat.
Your eyes
Are now wide with fear and anticipation,
Brimming with tension of the nearing task
As you crouch to stab your best friend,
They are bloody and maliciously murderous.
They have no mercy for the person you’re about to expire.
You are a best friend-killer.
Your eyes
Are now glasslike and lifeless,
Reflecting the world without expressions
As you akin to as any chopped off log,
They are static and immortally so.
They show crystal-clearly the coldness you feel,
You are dead.
Your eyes
Are now burning with flames-red and gold,
Mirroring all of your pat sinful deeds
As you stand beside the Devil himself,
They are gleaming with pride as the Devil praises you.
They also regret deeply for not having killed more.
You are in hell.
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,798 Reviews
thanks a million everyone
snoink thanks for pointing out my mistake
thats a really unique poem. I like all the ways u use "your eyes" and then write stuff.
I really like it. The way we find out about the characters intentions through the person's eyes. Very good imagery too.
Aw... how cute. But... it should be "As you take your very first step." Notice the your...
Expire? I like the word "murder" better.
Not pat... past.
All in all, not too bad. But I couldn't help but think of Harry Potter when I read this. "So that's what'll happen when Voldemort dies!"
Yep... such a geek.
i DON'T believe in hell-nor heaven-nor anything else of that sort (i hope i'm not causing any bad opinions saying this). thanks .
Yes the accidental deletion was my fault as you know. Sorry about that your poem was unfortunately the first topic i've ever tried to move as a moderator and I can't apoligise more.
I really enjoyed this poem when actually reading it. I like the way the stanzas mirror each other but each one progresses through the development of this well evil child! I have to say not being someone that necessarily believes in hell I found the ending a bit hard to great. But some lovely images in this all the time and evidence of a great poet.