Me and The Past

I really liked this, it was kind of how I portray my past and myself and how I wish I could go back in the past too, I really think that this is how a lot of people feel about each other and the parts I liked the most in the poem were, Did I grow? Or did I hide? Hide a part of me I was afraid no one would like? I really liked that because I hide myself in school and my friend would act all goofy, and I would get so red from people looking at me hang out with her, but soon I overcame that those people weren't my friends and if they were, I wouldn't be caught dead betraying my all time friend for some cool people who asked me for stuff and never treat me right, I really think I learned something poem and hope to hear a lot more poems from you, because they are really interesting.

i really like the poem. i understand it and you have some really great talent!

Hia

Just wanted to say it was awesome and I enjoyed reading it


~GMAmuffin~

First off let me say. HARRY POTTER LOVERS ARE AWESOME.
Okay now in all maturity ahaha. I really loved your poem and it made me tear up a bit in all honesty; because at the moment I too am looking back on an old me and contemplating who I am now. SO with that said, it is pretty darn good.
Only suggestion I would give it to try to find more descriptive strong words. Look up some synonyms that always helps me. I felt like I heard the word happy too often. But other than that I really enjoyed it, and I would love to hear more of your poems.

Wow, this is really, really good. I love the whole childhood happiness feel of it. Especially for being your first poem, this is very well written.
I just have a couple nitpicks/suggestions.

I close my eyes,
Remember those times I don't think a period is required here.
When I used to jump about. Here, I think you could either keep the period or add a semicolon.
I used to have my fun.

I wish I could be there now. Period instead of comma.
Why did I change?
Why am I like this?
What happened to me?

Did I grow?
Or did I hide?
Hide a part of me
I was afraid no one would like?

I used to talk a lot.
I was an unstoppable chatter box.
But I was happier that way.
Wasn't I?

I see myself in photos,
A happy, cheery girl. Period.
It seemed so natural to smile, then. Period here, too.
I wish I was her again.

Great work! This is an incredible first poem you should be so proud of yourself! The feelings you have emoted in this poem are strong and powerful! My only suggestion is, i wish for more contrast between the old you and new you. This would involve more vivid imagery and metaphors to get the readers feeling that happenings. Therefore, allowing them to feel even MORE hurt as well. Incredible start, do not stop!

Hi! I like this poem because it's simple, and I think that goes along with what you're writing about. It says what it's trying to say very well.

I do have one suggestion. You could add a little more life to the poem by incorporating some vibrant verbs and nouns. I don't want you to sacrifice the simplicity of this poem, because that's the part I absolutely adore.

I was an unstoppable chatter box.

Did I grow?
Or did I hide?
Hide a part of me
I was afraid no one would like?

I can relate to your poem. When I was younger, from preschool right up to the brink of middle school, I was a spaz. Life was fun and I didn't have any real worries.
The only things that bother me slightly are all the rhetorical questions you ask in your poem. Although I do think they are somewhat appropriate because this poem is obviously more personal and specific. Rhetorical questions are tricky, and sometimes they can be simplistic. Unless you use them correctly, rhetorical questions can make the author sound unsure of themselves in a way they don't want. I understand that in this particular poem, you ARE unsure, but they can become tiresome.
Anyway I like your poem, I hope you find your answer.

I red this because off your name!!! and it was cool but I cant understand poems...

let me start off with, i love your poem! how you look back at the past and wish you were there or wish to be the happy person you used to be but now aren't so much.it's the way i understood it because as i read,it began to reflect,it gave me feelings knowing it's just the way i feel.the past was some happy time now everything changed,including yourself and you wonder if that had anything to do with it.great job!