Young Writers Society

I really like that the first line is a bit ambiguous on whether it's the sun sighing or the speaker, because both are an interesting way to start a poem and it makes a connection between the two from the start. It's simple but definitely captures the sort of dreary sadness of the solstice where the nights stretch out. I think "All" should be lowercased, or a period added after "year" maybe, unless maybe you're using the lack of end-punctuation to signal a kind of ongoing-ness? Good alliteration and consonance throughout the poem too in "sighing / sun / set", "has/horizon", then "slowly / stolen", "warmth / more", "world / weary / winter" ~ it adds a nice continuity to the piece and helps the poem flow really well.

Thanks for sharing Lael! <3

Hi there Lael!

First and foremost, great work! It is awesome when one can write a poem that is relatively short but hold a lot of meaning. I really feel that your poem puts the reader inside a moment. It is important to be able to transfer your reader into the world of your work, to see and feel what the poem intends. Winter is one of my favorite seasons, but I hear that Winter is a sort of depressing season for some. I feel like your poem kind of represents a melancholy, nostalgic feel. It starts off with a sigh, it could be a sigh of relief or sadness. We all have to come to terms with the world around us, as it changes. I think you did a great job. Keep up the good work!

Wow! I think this is an amazing poem! I really enjoyed it! Thanks for sharing!
I think the whole poem is just PERFECT! It’s short and really sweet.

“Sighing, the sun has set on the horizon”

A really nice way to start the poem.

“I look at the little world around me,
And find that life itself has grown weary”

Those were definitely my favourite lines. I think you are an amazing poet.
Keep writing!
Rida