Young Writers Society

This is ZeldaIsShiek here back for some more reviews on poetry! Before I begin, however, I'd like to mention that the title of this poem was a bit confusing. Confirming the protagonist/narrator as a granddaughter make the poem feel like it is addressed to a grandparent. However, there is no mention of a grandparent at all in the poem. Poems are supposed to be confusing, though. Let's begin!

First off, I'd like to say that I really liked this poem. I thought it fit very well into context with the title and description of the poem. I really think you did an amazing job here.

That's pretty much it for today! Sorry this one was so short. ZeldaIsShiek, out!

Hi! my name is MagicAce and I am new to this site and this is one of my first reviews so I hope you can find it helpful.

So I will start of with the negative stuff first.
To me I was thinking that instead of after "you said you loved me
just the other day"
it could be like "you said you loved me
days ago"

or "you said you loved me
but look ware we are now"

"you said you loved me
but your a tragedy,
waiting to happen
for I would have never seen
what was to happen next"


and thoughs are just ideas but maybe something different then "just the other day" to me that just doesn't sound right, but that is just a suggestion

the good things, um, I liked your work it was pretty good and I can understand if you want to keep it the sane, that is not such a bad thing if you leave it "just the other day" again thoughs other ones were ideas.

I think you did great and I cant wait to here more of your work

MagicAce out!