Don't call him out
Don't say a word
What he's speaking
He's never heard
-
Don't sit beside him
Don't say hello
He'll take down your day
Faster than you know
-
When he comes in
Just kill him with kindness
When he says hello
Watch his blindness.
-
It's so hard, I know
So just hold on my dear
What I've told him
He'll never hear
-
Don't call him out,
Just come right here
For the days are numbered
And God is near.
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,730 Reviews
I wanna get this straight, this poem is, in your perspective, an abused child waiting for god, or someone, to help her/ stop her abusive father?
Just an artful statement of what is going on currently. My father can often be emotionally abusive but it is not my place as the child to call him out on it. All my mom and I can do is pray sometimes because only God can change his heart.
Yes, yes it is your place to call him out. A father's duty is to show his child love, affection, and to help prepare his child for the world ahead (i.e getting a job, getting a wife, everything that he currently does or has had to do to keep him and his family afloat). If God is the only one who can change your fathers mind than he is no longer a human being, but equal yet opposite to God. For a child's plea not to have sway on a father's mind means he no longer feels.
"I'm really liking the way this whole poem is formatted.
It rhymes, yet makes since. Also has facts to it about God being near.
Everything that's going on in the world today is eveident that we are at the ends of times today.
So much violence, fighting and hatred. God is still in the midst and is yet and still in control of everything that is going on. The poem is simple, but very creative. You have potential keep up the awesome work!
Thanks:)
Hello, this is a very strange yet interesting poem where the reader is left thinking about the message behind it.
I only have a few nitpicks so I'll say them first to get them out of the way:
1. Don't capitalise every line, stick to the punctuation.
2. Maybe include more punctuation for example when you say, 'Don't call him out Don't say a word', maybe include a comma as the mini pause will make it all the more effective.
3. That's it.
Right, onto good stuff
In the first stanza, you start of really suspenseful. By warning us about 'him', the reader is drawn in to see if any more about this man is revealed later on. Also, by using the repeated word 'don't', the reader is made to feel as if they are in a lecture which makes them want to know why they are being told not to.
I love how you continue with this idea of not revealing much in the second stanza as it makes the reader feel insecure and thirsty for more.
In the second and third stanza, you break the pattern of 'don'ts'. By doing this, you make me re-read them-causing me to think about them more.
I think, by finishing the poem with the idea of numbered days, you create a whole new load of ideas of who this character is. I have interpreted him as the devil for he is the one who awaits the punishable. He is the one who will ruin not just a day, but the rest of your life.
Great poem!
That's all from me,
Godly.
Thank you! I will definitely take the puncuation into account.
Hi I LOVE THIS but what is it about?? Is it about an emotionally abusive friend?
It is about whatever you think it is, but in my perspective an emotionally abusive father
Ahhh....close enough. Good job!
Thanks
Hello
. Other than that, KEEP IT UP! 
Just dropping by to read and make a review...
First, this is a nice one. I liked the way you chose the tone and the words, the flow of the entire thing itself. It really calls out to some sort of warning to the reader and I think that was a good way to reel in the audience and not just another fictional character in the poem's story. I liked that in the ending, the author assures that all is well for God is there. That part somehow brings out more mystery, something that makes me think 'is the stranger really that bad?' Or 'why? What's the worse that he'll do that will actually call for divine intervention?'
Recommendations... Maybe label this poem to its genre as suspense, mystery or whatever it is that you think it should be
Hope this would be of help to you! :3
-Sybil (waltzingdreams)
Thanks. I didn't think much about the feelings when I wrote this, it just sounded right at the moment
I'm so glad I was able to make you feel something, its a big accomplishment for me.
Thanks. I didn't think much about the feelings when I wrote this, it just sounded right at the moment
I'm so glad I was able to make you feel something, its a big accomplishment for me.