slash & burn

Hey! I thought I would try reviewing a poem, so here goes nothing!

The first thing I noticed about this was the irregular rhythm, but it actually works rather well. That's one fun thing about free verse poems; there's no pressure to rhyme or have a certain number of syllables per line! The uneven length stands out a bit here, but I like it, since it adds to the poem's effect.

I like how you managed to convey the feeling of sadness without really naming it, and it's easy to find the emotion behind this poem without it being explicitly named. It goes even further beyond being sad, in fact, hitting the reader's hearts rather deeply. The end of the first stanza and the use of the word "jailed" also suggests the feeling of being trapped.

The last stanza is the most shattering, in my opinion. Sometimes, you get tired of crying what you feel like are the same tears over and over again. The desire to not have to cry again is something many can emphasize with, and it adds tragedy, as it most likely means there have been many tears shed in the past.

This is a powerful poem you've written. I hope you're doing well.

- Shadow

This is an interesting poem. Hey there, I am Buranko annd I will review your poem.
The atmosphere you created is pretty mysterios and tragic, though at times it is kind of vague. I really like being transported into the persona's thoughts and feelings. However, as I said, this journey can be quite difficult. The introduction was awesome. You used the concept of calmness and transformed it in a harmful thing. The calmness is the one destroying the persona's heart and causing him/her anxiety. The second stanza was really awkward. You make it seem like the idea of overthinking is also harmful however you end it on a neutral tone. The second line is too long, it destroys the flow pretty badly and also it isn't related to the next line in any way. This stanza needs some serious revision.
And the ending of the poem also uses the same neutral, robotic tone of the second stanza, but you added that human side to it, with crying at least one more time. The longing for that last feeling is impressive and heart breaking. Profound suffering is expressed through the line "one by one". Ahhhh I love that!
Good job, nice idea, really looking forward to what you will be coming up in the future.

I adore how angsty this is. The use of harsh descriptors really adds to the atmosphere. An easy read, for the most part. Though some errors-such as eyeballs being split into two words-is jarring, and did cause me to withdraw from the piece.