I was born.
I was used.
I was reused.
I was reused again.
And again.
And again.
But people didn't adopt me.
said the Cliched Idea.
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141,399 Literary Works • 674,387 Reviews
Hi DrFeelGood. This piece is really interesting, and made me think of a puppy sitting in a pound waiting for adoption, and a girl being abused, at the same time. This isn't necessarily a bad thing because some pieces of literature have many messages that intertwine.
I liked the way you worded it because it has a really nice flow. I think the ending you gave it worked very well, because it provided another dimension to the piece. Instead of just being a fairly ordinary work, you managed turned it into something much deeper, and made me wonder what you were actually getting at, but in a good way. I understood it, but it definitely had a sense of mystery about it.
Nice job, the only thing I can think of to criticize is, maybe consider taking off the second "And again", because it gets kind of redundant after a while. But I really liked this, so great job and happy writing to you!
~Caterpickle
Hi there!
Happy Review Day!
So I'm not exactly sure the nature of this piece but it really interests me. There's not a lot for me to review, but I attempt to do so. Firstly, with only eight lines, it is a little cryptic. But I'm thinking maybe the last two lines say it all. I'm thinking the cliche that "older kids don't get adopted" is what you're getting at, no? Anyway, I think this is nice piece. I would say it could use more substance but I think it stands on its own all right.
Conceptually the theme is, "Cliches became cliches but people never implemented it."
Example: There are thousands of movies, novels, essays on racism. How it is bad and how it shouldn't exist. So any work which uses racism has a 'cliched' theme but racism does exist.
I hope that clears your confusion.
That's a whole lot more interesting than my assumption. Ha, I love it! Very thought-provoking.
I'm using this concept as a conversation in my novel. I just wrote this piece to see whether what I am trying to say was making any sense. I'm glad the result was positive
I actually liked this a lot! Short and sweet, just like I like pieces like this.
You have a really good concept here! Being used through life is a powerful idea. However, I feel you really could do more with this piece. I absolutely feel that it is okay as it is now, but you could really add onto it to make it even more stunning.
I'm not telling you to change it, but I am saying that this still has a lot of unused potential that you could definitely use. This could really blossom into a beautiful piece if you use that potential.
Thank you for formatting this mostly correctly. It allows the readers to look at the context over the visual presentation, and lets me really read it, not just look at it. Good job with that.
However, you didn't capitalize one of the first letters! Since you capitalized every other first letters on the first lines, this one looks inconsistent and draws my eye in a negative way.
This is the line:
"said a Cliche."
Maybe you could correct it to:
"Said a Cliche."
But this is an amazing start! Good Job!
Happy Writing!
<3
Thanks for the comment.
I'm using this concept as a conversation in my novel. I just wrote this piece to see whether what I am trying to say was making any sense.
Hi, Ruby here for a quick little review on this, because it made me laugh.
Well, to start off I was a bit worried when I saw the title- it seems so sad! I was worried about you for a quick second there. Obviously, though, not your point.
The first three lines are good because that could apply to, honestly, a lot of things. Also saying 'but people don't adopt me' was good, because it was almost like a clue. This whole thing could be a pretty good riddle. I must say.
I also liked how you capitalized Cliche. That's the part that made me laugh because it was like these were complaints coming straight out of a cliches mouth. A good, very short read.