and when it is dark,
when all you hear is the sound of silence,
when the darkness is finally tangible
who is it that you turn to?
to be saved from the monsters under the bed,
or from those on top of it?
which is your weapon of choice?
is it your words, sharp as a knife,
or your body, fragile as glass?
perhaps you’re one of the enlightened ones,
and realize that salvation is impossible.
it is of no matter.
you’re mine to claim,
and I’m coming for you.
every breath you take,
every step your light foot treads,
brings you to me.
your final destination is a constant.
roar with anger,
despair in hopelessness,
it is of no concern to me,
for I am DEATH,
and you have no say in this matter.
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Canary word: Present
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125,008 Literary Works • 672,826 Reviews
Hello! Here's a short review for you:
Your poem is very beautiful. The twist at the end caught me off guard and it was a very smart idea.
You started the poem strong and ended it with a great touch.
I also like these contradicting images:
" to be saved from the monsters under the bed,
or from those on top of it?
which is your weapon of choice?
is it your words, sharp as a knife,
or your body, fragile as glass?"
Also, great title!
Thank you for sharing this beautiful poem.
This is a very powerful work and it is presents something like a story but I don't think it can be considered a balled.
The poem is great and the name suits well.I think you can work on the wording in the first 2-3 lines,the sound is not very clear.The first half of the poem and the second do not connect well ,I think you can work a bit on that.The theme of the poem is amazing and it presents an amazing feel right from the start.
All in all a great work and I hope you keep on posting such good works😊.
Wow that is a very chilling poem i have to say. You did a wonderful job it is a very nice read unless of course you are by yourself then you feel an odd dread/fear ( ir you just so happen to be me ). That poem is like death just opened its mouth and started whispering in your ear, reeaallly creepy, I feel you meant it to be. It is also slightly philosophical in a way. I overall loved your poem it made me think and it made me feel. Both of those are things good poetry needs to do, and all without a single rhyme. Be proud of yourself. Keep writing.
<3