The Thought

Hey! VegasLights here to give you a review. Hopefully, this will help, or else, I'm just speaking complete nonsense. Anyway, let's get on with the actual review!

Honestly, I love your poem, I really do. I'm not just saying that to be like one of those soccer moms who give all of the kids' trophies, I'm saying the truth. I like the thought of your poem. What I mean is, you bring out the stages of suicidal thoughts. Most people don't get it, and that is NEVER a bad thing. Your poem will hopefully make them understand what goes through the mind as all of this is happening. I also like the fact you don't state the cause of the pain. Because when you are suicidal, everything just adds up! There is not one thing that causes someone to do that, but many. If you did add that element to your poem, I advise doing an event style. Like, their parent left next they got bullied, and so on. It doesn't even have to be the typical story. Anyway, please keep up with the great writing!

By the way, if you feeling this way, please PM me. I always have a listening ear ready to help! Just want you to know there are multiple people on this site who are more than willing to help. We even have spots for you to talk about this kind of stuff. If you don't feel this way but you wanted to bring awareness to it, I'm sure some people would be more than willing to help shed some light on the subject.

Thank you for this awesome poem and good day!

Xo.VegasLights

Radrook here to provide my feedback to the best of my ability in an effort to provide feedback to those who are requesting it. Please note that I strive to avoid offending and if I by any chance might do so, you have my most sincerest apologies.

Thanks for sharing this poem about how the process of decision-making goes from one consideration to another until we are finally faced with an option which might not be the ideal. That's where hesitation and procrastination come in. Especially if the decision engenders dread.

That dread is made clear by describing the speaker's heart as being clenched in fear. The speaker seems to feel that this fear will determine his decision. The speaker tells us that the results would be catastrophic but since it provides some kind of escape, he considers doing it anyway. Yet the fear will determine what he chooses? That seems to indicate that he won't.

BTW

Since we are not specifically told what engenders this fear, as a reader I could not agree that the fear should be the determining factor in making the decision or not.

Please note that not all fears are equal. Some fears are irrational. Other fears are phobias. Other fears might be based on selfishness. For example, fear of losing our money if we help a person in distress. Or fear of losing our beloved if we introduce her to someone. Or even fear of sharing knowledge because we don't want others to feel equal to us.

It reminds me of this Sci FI episode on Twilight Zone where this man was a leader of stranded humans on a planet. He had enjoyed the prestige that leadership brought for many years. When a rescue ship arrived he feared returning to Earth because he would no longer hold that leadership authority. So based on that fear he tried to convince them that they should remain on the planet. They of course saw the motive ad left anyway. He remained behind alone.