Finally Broken

Hello, E.E here for a possibly quick review and maybe some utter nonsense! Grim is here as well, drinking hot cocoa and being a slacker. *Grim looks over, glaring* So, lets get started.

So, to start off this review, the grammar is great. ((better then mine most of the time to be quite frank.)), but i feel like its rather plain. Bold some of the words, underline or italise, italiczie? I dunno how to spell that word but anyways, I LOVED the poem. Speaks to me. Also, WELCOME TO YWS! Glad to have a new member! Need to reivew any thing? Check out my new and old poetry, maybe even my novel! ONTO THE MEANING!!!

Now is when I dissect your poem and see if I can't get its meaning right! So, in your poem you are telling us, the reader, that you have finally shattered, a vase upon the wooden floor. You can't function anymore but you still are going through the motions. You can't feel happy. I know the feeling Cap. I know the feeling. Need to talk, I am here, just PM me.

Overall, I loved the poem and keep up the good work! Happy Thanks- WAIT, MERRY CHRISTMAS, I CAN SAY THAT NOW! OR HAPPY HANUKA I really need to go now Grim has souls to reap and he needs more cocoa. He has a problem, seriously. Cheerio and fruit loops to you!

There was a deep hopelessness about this poem, and the language was very powerful. The final line being split up the way it was is very effective. It's almost like the person in the poem was still clinging to a bit of hope throughout the poem, but just couldn't hold on, and was falling apart in despair.

Thanks for sharing this utterly somber poem expressing the idea that sometimes resistance is futile. The poem certainly convinced me that that writer feels that it is indeed useless to offer any further resistance to what he considers to be his fate.

Whether or not that is a totally subjective fact or an objective one, there is no way to say because of insufficient data which prevents an evaluation. But the sincerity of the feeling is there. Of course it is sometimes useless to resist what is patently inevitable and accept what is unavoidable. Some might say that applies to old age. One has to eventually accept that one is indeed that person one sees in the mirror regardless of how distasteful that realization might be. There are also moments in life in which one must admit defeat as the Japanese's did during WWII when obviously any further resistance was useless.

So to say that the poem is suggesting that we give up when there is still hope isn't really justified unless we know for sure that what the poem is talking about is a hopeless situation which we don't.

Suggestion:

Organizing the poem into stanzas would help make it more easily readable.