Young Writers Society

Hello! I'm back for an "Adopt a novel" review!

This is an interesting chapter that fortifies his interaction with Stephen. Well, there is something, even if Rober is not really sure what, but he surely has something for him. It's nice to have that shown with Stephen interrupting his hetero-dream he had.

Now, there is something that so far stood out for me here. I don't think I've noticed anything like that so far in your story, so let me say it; this part of the sentence
"but I am mature and he’s not"
is just something I wouldn't have expect to hear from the character you have created. Now, if that sentence itself was intentional, and I hope it was, than it is really good, since what we so far witnessed was Robert pretty much loosing it, and giving us such an obvious evidence within that small sentece is great.

Your style was on level with what you have done so far, so well done.

-Alchemist

Such a teenage boy xD In an assembly and thinking of having sex with the teacher... *snorts*

Although, I'm not sure why he wanted to have sex with her? You described her as a lanky witch. There's gotta be something more, something sexy that appeals to him and makes him want to have her right then and there, yes? Otherwise, why would he be wanting to have sex with her?

You're good with detailing the scene, but try to give more imagery details. What people look like, what this assembly looks like, all that jazz. Help us see the scene as Robert is seeing it.

I'm still laughing from the odd twist on his sexual fantasy. I'm sorry, but I do believe that Robert is a bit insane, and I will continue to believe this as time goes on. I mean, how do you go from participating in a sexual act to a guy running in and setting a girl on fire?! Major mood killer. xD

Overall, this is getting good. I'm actually a bit confused to see that Robert didn't get in trouble for brutally attacking a frog corpse, but other than that, this has been good so far. Nice work ^^

Hey Babe <3
So, another review for the next chapter. You know I said I felt like this was a little bit short and it left me wanting more because it’s really good and I want to see where the story of these characters goes.
The opening line:

Do we still really need assemblies?

I am not mentally challenged. I have just overslept.

I have read up all about psychologists, particularly ones based in schools. Not only do these “doctors” refer to themselves as child psychologists-

I never used to talk to him, but now…

like someone pulling his trousers and boxers down, subsequently exposing his cock in the assembly…

“you can do it guys” music,

Maybe if the school waves its magic wand hard enough (I know, Freudian pun; grow up)

writhing

“What happened? Did someone fart and ruined it?”