Young Writers Society

Hmm. I agree completely. I've always been an imaginative person, and the last line about it being more pure a light than what is naturally found is an argument I have had with many of people. The mind is the most powerful force in this universe. And I once read "in the mind, you find the greatest of freedoms," which seems to sum this poem up nicely. Your talent for being short and brief, i admire, but I think you could have continued this and made it just a bit longer. That is just a suggestion, though.

Keep writing!

Another Apple Dumpling-brand Review!

I love the image of the lotus, like the user below me, but I feel as though it could have been replaced with another stalked flower just as easily. Is that the case? If not, I suggest you try to make it a lot more specific to what you are trying to say, as I think it could make it work a lot better.

My favorite part was:

Dominating darkness to see the light of life.

Luminescent with the energy of a cloudless day

Hello, a review from the apple dumpling gang. Firstly, this a very nice poem. I love the idea behind this poem and that reference to the lotus. Your starting was great and so was the ending. i also liked the wide vocabulary used in this poem. I liked the usage of simile in this next line:

"Thoughts blooming like a lotus;

Full of compassion and beauty"

I also like the usage of metaphor in this line:

"Using the body as a mere vehicle: a mirror of the psyche,

More pure in its native form than light itself."

Overall: a very well written poem.
- anshira

Heyo, Lati here to do a review for you!

Let me start off by saying one thing... OOH, THIS IS PRETTY! I really liked this poem.

I can't really find anything wrong with this poem, which makes me happy (And sad, because I LOVE correcting people, grammar wise.) So let me tell you what I like about your poem. c:

My favourite lines in this poem are:

"That lotus still blooms

More pure in its native form

than light itself."

I like these lines because it's basically saying that your imagination keeps going no matter what.

Well basically, I loved the entire poem, but those lines were my favourite by far. Everything else was a close second. c:

Anyways, this was a really really good poem, and I hope you keep writing more lovely things for me to review!

Keep writing,
~Lati <3

Hi there Gcracker! Nite here to review for the Apple Dumpling Gang this fine Review Day!

Things I liked: The metaphor with the lotus. I think it could be developed more, though. Like what qualities does a lotus (as opposed to another flower) have that make it comparable to imagination? I think that would make this piece feel more vivid.

I also think the ending was nice and strong.

Critiques:

Full of compassion and beauty,

Grow to see the light of day.

Luminescent with the energy

of a cloudless day