PMD: Seventeen Plates DT 2

I just finished reading your post and wow... That was excellent! It was quite emotional, but I loved every part of it (even though some parts made me nervous for the characters' sake). I can't right now, but later this week, I shall write an SB review of it, like you did for Robusto's posts.

And yes, Jewels was portrayed excellently — she often has to deal with her brothers' nonsense, so you got that part right. I was worried that she might push Twinkiel too far — while Gabriel knows when to stop provoking people, Jewels sucks at diplomacy and is rather blunt — but the situation didn't escalate that far, fortunately. But I'm delighted you went first, since now I have a subject for my post.

So it's just Twink, Rift and Jiojio. Excellent. This is gonna be a crap-load of fun! Hopefully nobody minds if I post next? It's been a while.

However, there are some things I'd like to bring up, @Tortwag, and note that you haven't necessarily done anything wrong, Riley is simply a tough character. You see, since Flurry came around, Riley's worked through his trust issues and established a relationship with the people around him, but remember, Twinkiel is very new to Riley's spectrum, so he's still trying to trust the Flaafy. Because of this, there were a few things that made me raise an eyebrow. Firstly, Riley, like me, despite gaining confidence is not usually one to pipe up in the middle of a heated argument like he did. He also would not be very likely to chase after Twinkiel like that. And third, it is highly unlikely that Riley, (being, let's face it, emotionally fragile,) would agree to go alone with Twinkiel after having JUST freed Articuno, and having his face dragged on the ground by the 'mon.

I'm not asking you to change the post, just remember in the future that Riley is a complicated, and very emotionally-based character. He acts on his impulses, does not engage in unnecessary conflict, and can be easily made sad or angry with the wrong thing said or done.

I'll try to express all this in my next post, so you can get a feel for what I mean, but I hope what I said helped you get a deeper feel for my character.

Sooooo am I clear to post? ^^

I am double-posting for the sake of bringing this back. <;

In other news, my birthday is this month on the 20th! You are all invited to the party. There will be toast, and uhhh... pean buter, and errr... ummm..... toast. ^^

@AstralHunter I think the main reason this is so emotional is probably because it's based on a real experience, lol. Except that Twinkiel got a much sweeter revenge than I did.
...Never mind, I still got to steal the Mario Kart, so mine was no so bad XD
(I don't torture bugs, though. I just kill them).

Memories aside, thank you! It's the first time I'm going that far emotionally for Twinkiel. And waitin' imatiently for your SB review, Astral! I had done one for Char, though, too. And one for 15253.

Ah! That's reassuring. And yes, I first I wanted her to push Twinkiel too far, just so she could see and experience through some Enel Impacts how actually insane he is, but I decided to keep that for later. And yup! Ball is on your side, so use it well! Good luck


@Charizard821 And Ariala. And Zulu :3 They're always in the group, don't forget them!
Some things to bring up, you say? Let me read that.

1. ...Ah. Not the type to pipe up on a- Yeah, that's interpretation problem. See I thought he was the kind of instinctive good guy who'd be unpredictable because of said instinct, which are pretty much the reasons why I made him act the way he did. It DOES seem to be out of character, now that you mention it, so allow me to modify this. And don't you worry, I don't mind! I didn't expect to get everyone's character perfectly from the get go - and I did expect to have troubles with Riley, Jewels and Raikou, so no real surprise there.

2. Yeeeeeeeeah, that was originally Ariala's part, so again, allow me to modify that. She's supposed to act more and more out of character anyway, because of Plasmia's influence.

3. Well darn it. I overestimated the 'Mon. Darn it, darn it, how am I supposed to correct that third part...? I don't actually have a backup for that one.
...Darn it. *sigh*
Yeah, no, don't worry, I don't mind all of this. I need to be more careful. Allow me to modify parts of it; even if you're not asking me to change the post, Shell Master Tortwag always has a plan B, and now is the time to spam the heck out of it.

EDIT: AHAAAAA! I found it! I found a modification way! That... Should work, hopefully! Oh well, you'll tell me when it's done. Allow me to brush my teeth and make my move!

Wha... your birthday? Oh! Interesting.

... Interesting indeed...

yuy pean buterz \.3./

pean butter an toastz. U gimme rite? I bring llama

@15253 ...Dude, honestly, if one day I need to add any weird food/animal-related cray banter to my collection, I am kneeling down and calling for your mastery of that art.
'Cause I have no idea why you're still talking about peanut butter and llama right now O...O

EDIT: Oooooooooooh. Char's birthday. Peanut butter.
...Oooooooooooooooh, I'm stupid. Ok then, never mind.


@Charizard821 POST. FIXED. And I NAILED IT!

...Or at least I think I did, you tell me!

*jumps into 15253's arms*

hai... am llama. Whar da pean butterz am hungy .3.


sorry. Me and 15253 have been away visiting relatives. Great post Tort! looking forward to when the story gets a moving ;p

@Verser Eh. Was just expressing how weirded out I was by the transition in the DT, is all. Probably 'cause it's 00:52 here.

Thanks, and yeah, that was mostly a stalling post, lol. I still lack the talent that you both have of making a plot/character mind advance in just a couple of swift lines.

That... I need to steal that ability :/

I'll check it out soon, @Tortwag.

XD @Tortwag, I need YOUR skill of amazing character development and emotional depiction. Trade me >3>

Congratulations, @Charizard821! School starts on the twentieth again, so my vacation will then be over, but I shall congratulate you here nevertheless. This will probably come as no surprise to you, but I am also having my birthday soon, as I turn eighteen on the fifteenth of July. The party will be held next Saturday, so you might not see me then, although I'll still try to log on.

@Tortwag, apparently my computer has problems with its power supply, but it's working again at least, so my reply and, hopefully, next post will be up by the end of tomorrow.

@15253 and @Verser, I was wondering where you two had been. Nevertheless, we're glad to have you back! (15253, I left a comment concerning Ren on page 75. Please go and read it when you have the time. )

Oh, before I forget, I shall be advancing the day to Day A6 in my next post. So Char, if Riley will have to go back to the SoS before joining Twinkiel, please say so as soon as you read this. If he doesn't, then our posts are independent, but if he must, well... yeah. But could you also give us an indication of how Riley will take leave if Flurry? I ask because Jewels and Flurry will become quite close, so it will have to feature in my post at least a little.

oh we're not back. We just found wifi :3

Wait... What? @AstralHunter, I am confused. As far as I could tell from Tort's post, (great work on the revision by the way, @Tortwag, it works perfectly,) Riley's group was intercepted by Twinkiel's group on their way to the Shrine of Safety, so they never actually got there. And I believe I have yet to write the actual interaction between Riley and Flurry but Twinkiel gave the explanation for splitting them apart. (And he did it quite well.) I believe it's because Flurry hasn't done anything to upset the Resistance, but Twinkiel is "untrustworthy", and Riley "conspired with an N.O. Legendary". They went off on their own with Fleedjio, Ariala, and Zulu (because Zulu was part of that group to begin with,) to gain the trust of the Resistance again.


Please tell me that was correct?

Also, who's posting next? I'm itching to do it!

Funny, Hunter, that you should share the same birthday as my mother.

@15253 ...Huh. Not sure if I wanna trade that, you're pretty good at character development yourself, lol. I guess I'll just have to practice a lot.

@Charizard821 I think Astral didn't read the revision yet, which makes it all very confusing.
First off, thank you very much, I'm glad I managed to ace the revision, that's reassuring.
Second, @AstralHunter, to summarise:

-Jewels' group is supposed to escort Articuno back to the Shrine;

-Twinkiel negociated Riley's freedom: the Riolu has been forbidden to join Articuno, and forbidden to leave Twinkiel's side until the mission is over.

-As you already know, Twinkiel must prove his loyalty to the Resistance by succeeding in his mission, as his discovered friendship with Hoopa kind of puts him in a "he is a traitor? A double agent?" situation.


Aside from that, yes Char, you pretty much understood everything about this new situation.

Oh, okay! Thanks for the clarification, @Tortwag.

@Charizard821, the sooner you post, the better.