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Re: The Hunt: Chapter 6; Why can't supernatural beings come at a more convenient time?
Well this concept has me absolutely hooked. All the fun I could have with the power to freeze random people would be absolutely incredibly so kudos for the amazing concept! ...
May 1, 2016 -
Re: On Gender, Growing Up, and The Meaning Of Life
Well that was just a breath of fabulous fresh air. I consider myself to be female, but having friends who as you put it are 'genderblind' I understand how hard ...
May 1, 2016 -
Re: Time
Really amazing overall! I'm guessing lowercase was intended so I'll move away from that, but I'm not sure it adds anything but aesthetic appeal to the poem to be honest! ...
Feb 18, 2015 -
Re: The Answer May Lie in Silence.
OOOOOOH okay that repetition is on point, and the italics are great. I love the pace of the poem, it's so slow and that really help to indicate the passing ...
Feb 18, 2015 -
Re: No Answer for the Girl
Hi welcome to YWS! What a fabulous attempt at a first poem. I noticed some grammatical errors for example Lord should ALWAYS be spelt with a captain letter, even if ...
Jan 23, 2015 -
Re: Deception's Blade - Chapter Three (edited)
Hi! So I haven't read the first two parts yet but I will try because this was AMAZING. I really liked this chapter! it was so well written, your style ...
Jan 12, 2015 -
Re: A Look Through My Eyes.
When I read that first line, the firth thought in my mind was depression. She has depression. But then I realised- she is okay. It's just a thought. But in ...
Jan 12, 2015 -
Re: [Insert Title Here] Ch. 2
This. This is good. Instantly I really felt part of Arwyns story, and connected with her as a character. Your word choice is amazing, and really really effective. Amazing job. ...
Jan 12, 2015 -
Re: Lies, Cheating, Tears, & More Lies- Chapter Two
Hey! This is good! You have a really good structure, which is nice and I think the characters are quite everyday people, which I like :) As you said, your ...
Jan 12, 2015 -
Re: The boy who choose..
Hi! This was really captivating! Really great job! I have a some pointers though :P “In this life, we have to make many choices. Some are very important choices. Some ...
Dec 7, 2014 -
Re: deleted
I don't know what to write! That last line "Festive splendour, broken homes disguise." Was just so powerful, and a lovely ending to such a brilliant poem. It was such ...
Oct 27, 2014 -
Re: The Light
*cries* It wasn't what I was expecting, but this is so powerful I'm not sure what I was expecting! I like the vagueness to it, and the subtle suggestions. I ...
Oct 19, 2014 -
Re: Saying Goodbye
Aw! Really good job! The ideas of growing up to fast, moving away for the first time, and childhood beliefs are really releasable for many of us, and think you ...
Oct 19, 2014 -
Re: Eleanor's Remarkable and Infinite Bucket List {2}
Yay Scotland! Overall I think this story is brilliant! I liked the characters, and I really think they'd be fabulous together! XD The only thing that sort of annoyed me ...
Oct 10, 2014 -
Re: Serendipity
This is so lovely! Heartbreaking, and terribly sad, but lovely all the same. I LOVED the perspective, and the narration was brilliant! Its so sad to think that he gets ...
Oct 10, 2014
