rissymay

Dude you have a note on the punctuation just like Allison Croggan! sorry it took me so long to review this. I did half a review and then forgot. hehe... ...

After I read this poem again and again, I love it more each time. Your vocabulary and descriptive words are beautiful- the thing is, it's so advanced that my un-advanced ...

duuuuuude I didn't know you were posting poems on YWS! Excuse my ignorance, my dear! A tearjerker that tears.--replace tears with something else? rips, perhaps? I love the last stanza- ...

Hello again, it's rissymay. Here's what I thought on chapter 2: "Just you watch" Sal said darkly. "I bet he's going to give us extra homework, like we haven't got ...

Hey there, it's rissymay again. Here's some stuff I thought about chapter one: I really like the beginning- it intrigues me and makes me excited to read the rest of ...

Nice, dude. I like the idea and message you're trying to get across. Comment time! Do you not see the twinkling stars as faeries, Or thunder above your head the ...

'Ello! I really like the concept of your story here. Here are a few nit-picky comments: gave birth to a girl with eyes of no specific color, eyes that were ...

Hello! This is an interesting piece you've written... here's what I think: It either gives us a feeling of fear or protection-- ok, so I know when I look out ...

Hey there! Nice story! Here are some of my thoughts... It was a warm summer night, the trees rustled in the winds as the wailing woods continued to wail.-- you ...

Hello! Rissymay, here, and I have a few comments on your story: As I turned the corner I saw a bear-- ok, it's kinda odd how the main character turns ...

Hey! You have a really nice story! Here's a few of my thoughts: The introduction paragraph is very beautiful and transitions well into the story. The only thing about that ...

Great job writing this! Here are my thoughts on this: The dust danced like the wild flickers of a flame in the sunlight that pierced through the gaps of her ...

Hello! I read your story, and here's what I think about it... You repeat "life-piece" in the first paragraph- try to find a way to reword the second sentence. Why ...

(I just assumed that the main character is a "she.") The transition you made in the second paragraph to the sea to her grandpa's death chills me. I don't like ...

I love the style of having the adjective come first in every line... This poem is haunting and makes my heart pound... great job with it. I don't know much ...