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frenchpastry

  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Phoenix Rising - Book One of the Elemental Project, Part One

    Hm, interesting. I wish I could write you a better review here (I might later today), but I have to get offline. I just wanted to say that I loved ...

    Nov 20, 2007
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Blood Moon

    It sounds more like something you would read on the back of a book. It's really interesting. If I picked this up and read this in a book store, I'd ...

    Nov 20, 2007
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: Angel in my Arms

    I agree with the others. Also, I would suggest not using so many exclaimation points, especially when Jade is speaking. You don't need them. A period is just fine and ...

    Sep 17, 2007
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: The Diary Isabella Mason

    I don't really have a critique for you, but I just wanted to say that I really liked this. Very good developed characters. Interesting plot. I can't wait to see ...

    Sep 1, 2007
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: Hail Mary

    Wow. I don't know what else to say. ;) It was amazing. There was so much emotion, and the plot was just downright brilliant. I definently think you'll win the ...

    Aug 2, 2007
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Due North

    I'll make this short and sweet. I have to agree with a few others, you're telling the story, not showing it. I know you say it is just the beginning, ...

    Aug 2, 2007
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: The Marquis de Sonfield

    Wonderful writing. ;) But you're right, it is typical. The 'Love-Hate' relationship is very prevalent in the Romance genre. Not saying that that's bad. It's just... over-used. And of course, ...

    Aug 2, 2007
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Guardians

    I have to agree. More paragraphs would be nice. ;) It will present your story better. Anyway, on to the critique. The dying screams of her mother still echoed in ...

    Aug 2, 2007
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Sorceror's Descendant-Prolouge:Dark beginnings

    Just a few errors and suggestions: At once he felt There is supposed to be a comma after 'At once'. Nothing too big. ;) At once he felt the feeling ...

    Jul 29, 2007
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: Speak

    I saw the movie, and am still looking for the book. The entire plot was powerful. I absolutely loved it. It's one of my favourites. If you haven't seen the ...

    Jul 29, 2007
  • Lyrics » General, General Re: Just Another Girl

    I always said That I couldn't like you I even thought That I should've hated you But my mind's only playing Games with my heart again This part seems kinda ...

    Jul 29, 2007
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: A Prologue of sorts?

    I'm not very good at critiquing, but I do want to say that this introduction really caught my interest. My first thought was 'What happened? What's going on?', which in ...

    Jul 29, 2007


You wake up in the morning and it feels impossible? Good. You do it anyway.
— Martin Scorcese