darko.demark666

Welcome to YWS. I'll review your work (don't get mad about the honesty)..;) They said it wouldn’t last long, They said we are all wrong, They said we would be ...

You are confusing me... The punctuation is needed badly, but still you put it in some lines. Now you can say that this is poetic like others who are trying ...

Hi...welcome to Young writers society. Now on the critique... First - Punctuation needed. Second - 4th stanza: too long. It crashes your concept so far. You have to try to ...

Well...this is just a bunch of imperatives; sentences. If you put a comma somewhere, the poem would be better cause of connection that you make that way. Like in last ...

Hello! First-the repetitions-not so much of a good thing here...The repetition "bring, bring, bring..." is(my opinion) quite good, but the whole stanzas??? Your poem belongs under the lyrics section w

I couldn't agree more with you in some things you said here... I don't know is it a review needed here.... ??? They think as a group? haha..nice said... I ...

*This is my random over the top with metaphors poem. Enjoy!* This is my story something...;) I'll write it like I please period. It's my fairytale and my tragedy period... ...

Hey there, I had a feeling that you are hitting me with words.... like you're just saying something to me that nobody wants to listen... Too many words, too many ...

I wish you wouldn’t look at me that way, With lust in your eyes, As you slowly examine me. I wish you wouldn’t lick your lips, As you look at ...

*Another miserable poem... *sigh* oh well, that's the way I am. Dark and depressing :D. Please review!* Drenched in my tears My heart drowned in pain. My thoughts are useless ...

dear God, I'm feeling dark inside, and small and hurt and weak inside. I need a place to crawl and hide: a safe, still harbour at your side [s]where unknown ...

This isn't a metal song for any of its elements...maybe new metal (crappy metal). Sure is aggressive but something just do not seems wright about it. It' strange... I have ...

Hey there, I find your poem really nice for its ....should I say atmosphere... You turned a regular, trivial cafe into something else. The metaphor is obvious here. Your struggle ...

First comes denial I spent a long time here Half a semester It felt more like a year The reader can find this too usual. Then, what does this have ...

A little girl by the sea Crying for all to see She always sat under the tree .. think this would be great with underneath the tree.. Wishing that one ...