chipsandguacamollie

I think this poem is great. It expresses what it is like for gay people very well, if a bit dramatically. The rhyme scheme is simple, but good. I do ...

First off, since you seem relatively new, welcome to YWS! I really like this piece. I'm really into any sort of utopian/futuristic society stories, and this is fascinating. I think ...

Okay, I'll give you a line-by-line (or almost) review, because I have time. Here goes. First Story First off, i really liked this. It was well written, easy to understand ...

This is really good. I love all of the comparisons, and can really visualize a person sitting down trying to describe this. I really only have one critique: You say ...

You should have at least two reviews before you post your own work, but it's okay. I actually really like this. Having the stanzas almost contradict each other is a ...

This poem is rather funny, and pretty good. Not my type of poem, but not bad. The rhyming was a little too precise, and in the last stanza, you changed ...

Wow. This poem is fantastic. The rhyme scheme is good, though a little odd in some places, and the message is great. I love the way you grouped the two ...

I like the message of this poem, even though it is a bit darker. I have a few nitpicks though. First off, when you say "And loving comments bounce off ...

This is really good. The rhyming gives it a nice flow, and I like the use of hyphens. There is one line that is bothering me though: "Pure change -- ...

I really do love this. The whole idea of the angels, and Katie being kind of goth is great. You do have some typos to fix, and I really do ...

This is good for a prologue, though a bit short. It draws you in and makes you curious about what happened to this person. You do have some errors though. ...

This is a good poem. Creepy, funny in an odd way, satirical, and ironic. I do have two small critiques though. 1. "We wouldn’t want you sleeping well;/that really ruins ...

I can't believe how much I enjoy reading this. It has a fantastic plot, great characters, and is amazingly well written. There are a few small errors though. Whenever you ...

Wow. This poem is just amazing. And I think every minor detail that is just slightly off has already been nit-picked at, besides one thing. When you say, "Where the ...

I agree one hundred percent with Midnight Vampire, besides the fact that there is nothing to edit, because I found one thing to critique. The bit with Kirun's sister seems ...