canislupis

This was good, the ending was creepy. You did the younger sister very well, but Vyla could use some work. The was you use her dialogue, she sounds a bit ...

Ok, this has me a little confused. First she's remembering when she "escaped" from the coven, and for once eluded the guards. and then she's reliving a time when she ...

AWWWW! *Snifs and blows nose* Anyway, I liked this. The emotion is well portrayed. But, you NEED to fix the errors. I also suggest finding a title for it. Anything ...

HI! Sorry I confused. :) I meant that the whole thing seems spaced out and planned, there are rhyming sylables, and the whole thing sounds rather like poetry when you ...

Short stories are quick to read and fun to review. Tiny stories are not. :) There is a fine line between too long a story, and too shorta piece, but ...

This was good! most of the suggestions I would have made have already been pointed out. But this felt realistic and it flowed well. I like the way you switched ...

This was pretty good! I would suggest finding a different, more original name for your MC. Steel is a bit stereotypic.... Anyway, this was well written and it kept me ...

Great job! I have to say that this is one of my favorite pieces that you've posted so far. The descriptions are great and the imagery is fantastic, and you ...

You're right that this could be considered offensive by some, but I didn't think it was that bad. You definitely do need to space it out more. This new "true ...

First off, I really liked the way your descriptions make it come to life, your imagery is excellent. Nature is very beautiful, and I like the idea of making a ...

Ok, this was alright, but it seems like it was written in a hurry ,and has numerous problems. This new true blue thing makes it hard to read, and I ...

Interesting. Your prologue promises a fascinating and intriguing story. There isn't much to comment on, but I mostly agree with the other reviewers. The setting could use more description, since ...

Ok, very good for starters. I found this piece intriguing and fascinating, and it could go really far. However, for every paragraph you have, there could almost be a page. ...

Most of the errors I found have already been pointed out. I really like the idea, the whole taking over microsoft thing. However, This was full of grammatical errors, and ...

I liked this, but found it very confusing. You keep switching back and forth from samuel, to dr. rees, to other characters. The actual story line was good, I liked ...