Vincent

Oh, yeah, and sorry, but I also agree with Secret Wolf about the names, really destroyed the effect for me. Sorry. Once again, Good luck, Nice Story, Cant Wait for ...

:oops: :oops: :oops: sorry everyone. i made one very huge mistake. forgot to add my short prologue. :oops: hope this helps with reviewing! vince p.s sorry

I edited it but can't find a better word for "oozed" thanks for the crit. i cant believe i actually missed those vince

yeah... i got it tough. its not confusing at all, you just need to see the words behind the words. i like it! vince

LOL!!!! just great!!!! i loved it!!!!! i liked the riming too it reminds me of someone...... try posting more like this! vince

i actually liked it and didnt find any problems. mabey im just tired... ill try again later and do a in depth torough research to try and find any problems. ...

i liked it! nice in depth meaning! great work vince

nice... i kinda understand it, it isnt confusing. i liked the riming and all great job! vince

thanks ink, and...........someguy. i really appreciate your crit, it pointed out stupid mistakes that i made. dang, i REALLY nead to work on info dumping. i suck in that. yeah, ...

This is a great poem. the only problem is that you seem to repeat words alot. keep it up! vince

this was creepily enjoyable (if thats a word) i liked it but someplaces rime and some dont, and has no solid structure, but hey, im no poet and not sure ...

this is a great poem. so if youd excuse me, im going to make my time count. (dang, i only read live changing poems today) keep it up vince

ok.... you scare me too :D just joking vince 8)

little short but i enjoyed it. couldnt find any problems vince

cool. ironic and funny keep up the good work! vince