UnicornSmilz

I really hope a second part comes out soon. It reminds me of Regina and whats-his-face from once upon a time (TV show), and I found that adorable. I also ...

Hi LadyPurple! So I liked the poem in general. The emotions in this piece of poetry really encouraged me to write more. :) SO since i am supposed to critique ...

There are some paragraph issues. When the mother starts talking, i suggest you make it a new paragraph. I like how you realistically describe the pain and anguish of Carmen ...

If this is part 1 i wonder what is going to be in part 2? During your first paragraph, you are making it sound like a tragedy is going to ...

I think that the wording when the hunter kills the queen should be more dramatic. It is when the hero prevails and the story is at a crucial turning point. ...

I personally think the end came a little abruptly. I would like it to go a little bit longer, but it was excellent without it. There were a few grammatical ...

The overall message was a great one, but the death wasn't as clear as it could be, and therefore not as impactful as it could have been. I am very ...

I think this is an awesome story so far, but you might want to describe his "family" a little bit more, and if you don't want to reveal what his ...