Toto25

Hello Gerbeh! I can see what you are saying here. But, the format is confusing. Try putting each sentence as a stand alone sentence. Example, "Could it be that I ...

I thoroughly enjoyed this piece! I felt the emotion in each stanza. The only slightly confusing line was "Sitting, Her scarf hidden ribs Heave from the effort. I had to ...

Hello! Tory here, welcome to YWS! The flow of your poem was fantastic! The only thing I noticed was the lack of punctuation, grammar in poetry is the exact same ...

Hey! Tory here, I really loved the idea behind this poem and it was in stanza's so thumbs up from me! Each stanza really had wonderful descriptive qualities but, there ...

Loved this!! I feel the exact same way, I have always wanted to do something great, be great. It was lovely but maybe you could make it a little longer, ...

Hello, Tory here. I loved the story, it had a simplistic beauty that I thoroughly enjoyed. Although The flow was a bit off, it was very stop and go. For ...

Awesome! The imagery was haunting, the characters intriguing, and the captivating. Overall a beautifully written piece. I am a Christian as well but I still loved it! You have descriptive ...

Hello, Tory here! I liked the idea of this piece. I enjoyed each teacher giving their point of view which happened to be the opposite of each others, it was ...

Beautiful simplicity! I love the title! my favorite line And on a cross He died all deaths and then He rose again! this poem reminded me of a book I ...

Hello, Tory here you reviewed one of my pieces so I though I would return the favor. I loved the flow this poem had and the grammar was spotless. Although ...

Hi! Tory here, first I would like to say I loved the rich use of vocabulary and the imagery that could be pulled from it. I did notice the lack ...

Hey! I really liked this poem! The only thing I would say is that the vocabulary could use some work. The part about the her lips being the reddest or ...

WOoaah! You can paint a picture! "clicks like" I love the imagery, I thought you brought something new to an age old way of describing situations. "The girl or girl" ...

I thought this poem was very moving. It showed how we as people can be manipulated like the toy soldier. How we lie to ourselves by believing we have control. ...

One suggestion that I may add is to separate the piece into stanza's, I've found that by doing that it gives me more clarity on what I am trying to ...