Teague

Hi there! I've seen you around before, but I don't think I've ever properly introduced myself. I'm Razorblade. Anyway, this is far too short and disjointed for a critique. You ...

Hi Snoink! You know, I think this is the first time I've ever actually read anything by you. And I'm satisfyingly impressed. :D Just a few kinks (and one random ...

This was better than before! For the sake of not being repetitive, I won't point out what Muffin already put. The difference between this piece and the earlier part was ...

Hi there! I see you're new here. Welcome aboard YWS! I'm Razorblade. Here at YWS, we have this little rule that states you must critique at least two other works ...

Hey there! This is much better than what you posted before. ;) Anyway, this has potential! The only problem is the fact that it feels rushed. You use a lot ...

Hi there! Welcome aboard YWS! My name is Razorblade. A few things I'd like to bring up before I critique this: Rules. Here on YWS, it's a rule that you ...

Aye, I agree with Kitty on this one. It's a very eloquent piece, but it really should be expanded. Unless you want to just leave it as flash fiction, which ...

I think you should just post the enitre story, dear, since there's not enough to critique in its present state. A makeshift news story does not fiction make. -St. Razorblade ...

Ooh, nice description. I can't really say much because there isn't much, besides probably register a complaint that it's very short. Which isn't really much of a complaint, unless you're ...

Hi there! I don't think I've seen you around YWS before. Welcome! I'm Razorblade. :) I can see some real potential here! You have a few fatal flaws, though; you ...

Well, I'm no poetry expert, so excuse if this isn't terribly helpful. :lol: I like all the stanzas except the last one- it doesn't quite click with the rest. You've ...

Holy cow, dear. This is waaaaaaaaaay too much. Divide it up into different threads; something this long is a HUGE deterrent to critiquers. And that's bad. I think you could ...

Hello again! How've you been? :D The council lay before me, garbed in robes of traditional white. The three sat upon their wooden thrones, stiff with resolve and age. Their ...

Ahoy! I've seen you around a few times, but I don't think I've ever properly introduced myself. I'm Razorblade. :) His head hung low he thought he was nobody This ...

Hello there! Don't think I've seen you around YWS before! My name is Razorblade. :) Emily pulled another loose piece of concrete from the wall that kept silly gradeschoolers from ...