Swires

Axe the names and the pronunciation guide and replace them with easy to read names!

Griffin is right - his crit on my pathetic and overly elaborate attempt at urban fantasy woke me up and I saw the light "Why do I need this description?" ...

About the present tense stuff - it's true it's relatively unusal, and can get messy and hard to read, but it is possible to pull off. From my own reading ...

I think the word you are looking for is Gary Stew :)

No, I don't like this - it seemed far to vague and I couldn't understand where you were going or what you were trying to say.

Format??? Add correct spacing in between speech and paragraphs.

I agree with everything else that has been said “Me either.” Shouldnt this be "me neither" ??? Good story.

I think Quatrains are the few occasions where a poem should rhyme. I didn't think this poem had a flow to it and was more of an overview than a ...

A little random and it didnt really have any meaning to it.

Well everything has pretty much been said. Personal Opinion: It seemed too tolkienesk - I couldn't be bothered to read it all. The beginning could be reconstructed to go straight ...

No, story line is way too cliche. Eragon has taken the dragon line by storm and no one can get a novel in edgeways with it.

Wow! Way to go! And that helps in what way? Please think about your reviews before you post them. :x

I read the first one and read half of the second one, forgot about it, reread to where I was, forgot about it etc... I just couldnt finish it, it ...

In this context - weather to portray emotion. For example in films they have happy scenes on a bright sunny day and dark, murder scenes in the night time even ...

Sorry, I misread "rhythm" for rhyme. And the poem seemed vague to me - but thats my opinion.