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Re: no title (this is my first poem)0
This is good for a first attempt at poetry! Now, let's see here ... Where to go to be alone? Is it possible to be alone when thoughts are a ...
Jan 18, 2006 -
Re: Photographic Memory
Disclaimer: I know nothing about the technical aspects of playing and/or singing music, but I'm a music fan and I know what I like when I hear it. Very pretty. ...
Jan 12, 2006 -
Re: Exit, Stage Left.
Mmmhmm. Lovely, darling. One thing that kind of stood out to me: "Up, a noise draws her attention. She stands, as in an ancient ritual . " That bit seems ...
Jan 4, 2006 -
Re: Cold Coffee
The beginning, to me, was just kind of ... eh. Then, the stanza about the ashes as eyeliner caught in my mind and I was hooked until the very end. ...
Dec 14, 2005 -
Re: uh... whatever
Two words: SPELL CHECK! Seriously, though, a little proofreading goes a long way, and takes hardly any time at all. upon turning ten years old the child wuold save the ...
Dec 14, 2005 -
Re: Étrange
Wow. This was absolutely amazing. You have wonderfully atmospheric writing; I can see everything unfolding before my eyes and in my mind as if your thoughts were my very own. ...
Dec 12, 2005 -
Re: ''Stop it... please...''
Wow, that was depressing. It's in non-fiction, so I assume it really happened. Is this about you? A close friend? Whichever it is (and I'm not asking you to share ...
Dec 10, 2005 -
Re: Poem--"Untitled" (In grudging memory of D)
Ooooooooh, very relatable! I believe I left before this ieatworms person's time, but after reading this, I'm not sure I'm sad I missed out on her. Anyways, on to the ...
Dec 9, 2005 -
Re: Wake me when September ends
Wow. Definitely a very pretty piece. Now, there were some things you weren't sure about ... I don’t think my heart can take much more beating from me remembering the ...
Dec 9, 2005 -
Re: revelation
I love this. Very pretty imagery, and the lines but as a greater god who might drop french fry crumbs or even a mc-chicken nugget in offering. (pigeons these days ...
Feb 28, 2005 -
Re: Reserved Tears
I like this a lot! Not much to say about it though; it's written pretty well. The idea is pretty good too. Light summer rain starts to fall leaving wisps ...
Feb 28, 2005 -
Re: SHOUT
I agree with Fire, the poem does scream at you, but unlike him, I like the senstion. :D A very very cool poem, but it does need to be spell-checked. ...
Feb 27, 2005 -
Re: Sale
:D I agree with Matt, that was a performance! Beautiful stuff...I also agree that you should break it up; I had to go back in some parts and read it ...
Feb 27, 2005 -
Re: dance beats and dark streets
To me the first stanza seemed disconected from the second stanza. I don't know, they just feel weird together. But the second stanza....wow. That's all I can say. It is ...
Feb 27, 2005 -
Re: i'm feeling unpoetic.
I like this a lot. lick mascara from their wounds. That line literally made me shiver. I honestly don't have any constructive criticism, except, like Misty said, it does feel ...
Feb 25, 2005
