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ShaydeDesiree

  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Dream

    [quote="XavierJohnson123"] Her bosom excited and agitated by the caresses of your hand. [/quote] I loved this qoute. It explains it so well. I am only 15, but I know what ...

    Dec 3, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Why I Do What I Do....

    I wrote a similar poem, and I have to say I know how you feel. But I didnt really like the ending. It was too much "in your face" and ...

    Nov 20, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Despair Consumes Me

    I dont want to be rude, but I didnt like it. It just wasnt as good as some of your other writing. There are some spelling mistakes that I noticed. ...

    Nov 18, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Won't Happen Again

    I loved this poem. The deeper meaning behind it made it even better. my favorite lines have to be; "I've been taken advantage of, I've been hurt and scorned. I ...

    Nov 17, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Love You Forever

    "But if forever was a day, I don't want to love you that way." I think this is the best quote throughout the piece. But i did love the full ...

    Nov 17, 2008
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Random Poem

    Dramma pointed out the mistakes for me. :) But i loved it, it is spontaneous, and fun. It put a smile on my face and that was what it was ...

    Nov 14, 2008
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: pain

    This poem captures the jist of depression, but if you want it to really touch someone, I would add a lot more. there are a few spelling errors, such as ...

    Nov 14, 2008
  • Short Story » General, General Re: That's What Life Is (Extract 1)

    This was an excellent piece for written so late at night. it made my cry! it was a shock when she said "Mom's dead". It brought back memories of when ...

    Nov 12, 2008
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Goodbyes

    This is beautifully written. I lost my father two years ago but it was kind of instant. but this still brings tears to my eyes. Its so raw and true. ...

    Nov 10, 2008
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: ...Mum, I'm gay.

    The story was told very well but they rhyming was off. I will not say it ruined the story but it did take away from it. There are some splling ...

    Nov 7, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: My Own Personal Haiku

    This is a short but sweet poem. I think it was great. I dont know how this fits into dramatic poetry but I loved it! It made me laugh and ...

    Nov 7, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: I never told you I loved you

    This poem is very well written. But the ending was kind of blunt. I felt like i wanted more out of it before she fell. "And Jake is weeping into ...

    Sep 24, 2008


Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results.
— Willie Nelson