Renard

Whoa! Great opening line. I love it, you really know how to hook a reader. You obviously have a great sense of humour and that really shows in your writing. ...

I can't fault this piece. It's fantastic! :) You seem to have put a lot of thought into the content and structure. Grammatically and technically it's really strong too. The ...

Ok. The content of the story is excellent, as is the pacing. But there are some glaring grammatical and spelling errors here. 'collage' should be 'college.' 'infact' is two words ...

I love the idea of using the alternate perspectives in your writing. This is really original and works really well. There is a LOT of dialogue in this work though, ...

You've captured really realistic dialogue here which is good. However, you have massive chunks of description, unbroken, which will need sorting. It can be intimidating to the reader to be ...

Some of the spelling in this entry has gone a bit awry. I wonder if you've done this in a bit of a hurry? 'awnsered!' You've still got your different ...

Okay, so this is not what I expected. The title lead me to believe something... else. (Blushing.) Actually, that works really cleverly. Although, as it develops it makes more sense, ...

You have varied the length of your lines really well to create appropriate emphasis and effect for the reader. Well done. I love the reference to the different instruments and ...

Good story, very intriguing, very long! Lol. But it's good because it shows you have the gumption to stick at your projects. One thing that really stood out was your ...

This is really good. Your use of punctuation, spelling and grammar is brilliant. However, your description relies heavily on colour. I would involve some more comments on texture and how ...

This writing is really good, particularly for your age. However, one big thing I noticed was that your lines of dialogue appear on the same line. This is a BIG ...

There is the distinct possibility that you could have written this piece whilst under the influence of something. Maybe you just have a very philosophical mind. Wow! I mean, I ...

I like this poem because it's really honest. Few people actually write 'from the heart' without sounding cheesy, but you have done this, almost as if it's a conversation and ...

I really like this story, you've captured the emotion brilliantly and it works really well in relation to the song. The only thing I can comment on is the lack ...

I love the way you have played around with the syntax in your work, such as: 'So happy was it now.' That's a really interesting take on a traditional style. ...