Rei

Woah! Relax. First of all, I'm sorry I said something that had been said already, but I didn't know. I don't read other people's replies when I write my own. ...

I definitely wish I could have been able to write that well when I was 8. But I definitely encourage you to rework this. You could have a decent picture ...

I like it. With a little work and the right actors, this could be very funny. Unfortunately I know little about comedy writing, so that's all I can tell you.

I just thought the story was stupid. It was poorly written, and I could not force myself to finish it.

Me like. The rhyming worked really well, and the meter was pretty good too. My only suggestion is EXPAND. I see potential for a ballad.

Comments please. :cry:

Me like. Definitely kept me interested. The dialogue was great. Very believable, which is a rare thing on sites like this. And I think you really did succeed in your ...

It was kind of dull, really. Not much about it hooked me. There were no characters, and little promise for a real story.

This is called a prose poem. It does not need to be put into stanzaz, and it was written this way on purpose.

I've just read Coraline. Not bad, though I prefer is short stories and poetry.

Sorry Nate. Silly Brad. I never asked you to shut up. How American of you to twist things so they make you look like the better person even when you're ...

It's okay. Nothing particular jumped out at me. However, "For to avoid" That makes so sense if you read it with the next line.

I really don't think you could. In the past when you have suggested we stop arguing, you have immediately started again when (from the wayyou I saw it) felt confident ...

Of course it wasn't written for kids. It was written for a community theatre project I was in last year. The play was about young women and the problems we ...