Random avatar

NaRachel

  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Letters to You

    Hello :) I love you're title and the last paragraph. What i disliked slightly was The sun is shimmering, peaking out behind the mountain Its just a little cliche, when ...

    Aug 6, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Before They Say Goodnight

    b-bm b-bm b-bm, is what my heart is doing right now, That last part was sooo intense and i'v e never read anything so shocking on yws. Can i first ...

    Apr 18, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Aether ~Hope's Light~

    WOW. I really, really, really liked it. I'm not a poetry technician but i would say you've really got the poetry/imagery thing down pat. Well done, it was really beautiful. ...

    Apr 17, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Untitled - part 1

    First of all, you stole my title for my story. Lol. Nice beginning i believe a story always needs an attention-catching opening. However your verging on introducing too many characters ...

    Apr 8, 2010
  • Lyrics » General, General Re: Oh star

    First of all i always love a "Slow, melodic, kind of soft" song. For the first verse: Very nice start( oh star, oh star) Its almost got a dear diary ...

    Mar 7, 2010
  • Lyrics » General, General Re: Seattle

    First of all its really sad and brought out real emotion in me so well done for that. I really, really liked it. From the moment i started reading i ...

    Mar 6, 2010
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: The Train

    I agree with Bryr in that it is soft and mournful. Its a pretty poem with a great meaning to it. You seem to be really good at that, putting ...

    Mar 1, 2010
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Without You

    First of all AWWWWW. Now that I've got that out the way, it has a really great rhythm and it almost sounds like a song. It has a simple but ...

    Feb 27, 2010
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: What Does Your Heart Beat For?

    Hey Toto25, First of all it is a gripping title which although verge's on the side of cliche is a great start! Also i would like to say add more ...

    Feb 27, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Keep Fighting

    Hey i'm not much of an expert on poetry but i think it was great! I especially liked the repetition of "Soldier" Nice storyline. Almost sounded like a song. It ...

    Feb 13, 2010
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: The Loving Ghost

    First of all this it has a really excellent beginning, very catchy, well done! Then i continued to read it and thought wow! I originally thought that your sentences were ...

    Feb 1, 2010
  • Lyrics » General, General Re: How a Heart Longs

    Hey i like how the sentences( i call them sentences but you could say lines) are short. I didn't really get the confusement. I love this bit So I may ...

    Feb 1, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: Diary of Kidnapping...Chapter 2

    Hey i read/reviewed your last chapter and have to say that once again i am positively impressed (although slightly jealous of your writing technique. It is consistently good. I found ...

    Feb 1, 2010
  • Lyrics » General, General Re: thanks for not being you

    Very good and unique. I understand the meaning behind most of it though some bits i'm unsure about. I think some bits sound like they're just being said (more like ...

    Jan 27, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Untitled Story, Chapter One

    Hey i think you have a really good writing style that sounds almost professional when you read it. You use just the right amount of big words and small words ...

    Jan 26, 2010


If you are tired remember it's a sign that you haven't expired
— fatherfig