Megrim

Hi there! I saw this in the green room so thought I'd check it out--I read the previous submission to make sure I didn't miss anything important. You have a ...

Back again for another fun chapter! I was right about his evening visitor--it WAS her, and she DID offer a chance to escape. Predictable, but it "feels" right, so I'm ...

Hi there! This is an interesting premise, with the "good" demons, and the MC needing to protect this half-human. I also liked how the brother falls in love, stays with ...

Now that I actually paid attention to the title and genre, I might be more informed with my comments :P But if you're writing for people who aren't familiar with ...

Hi there! I saw the next chapter up in the green room so figured I'd start here. I'm going to type down my impressions AS I read, so let's start! ...

Hi again! This was a really fun chapter. Not much happens plot-wise, but it's one of those descriptive chapters where the description is so interesting on its own, I don't ...

Hi! Going to do my "type down as I read" strategy today. --- I'm noticing that Elliot is a lot more responsive all of a sudden. He's replying to their ...

In this chapter we got a much-needed breather as both the characters and the readers get to slow down and take stock of everything. Using the "scenes and sequels" terminology, ...

Where the last chapter was a high point, I think now we're overstaying our welcome. I started to get really actioned out this chapter, and began skimming. I found there ...

This is my favorite chapter so far and the fastest read. It has some serious tension! That's the magic ingredient! There's a solid arc to this chapter--a unified scene with ...

Things are ramping up now and I think we're finally getting to the meaty chapters. This is where the stuff happens! Feels like we're onto the beginning of the capital ...

I enjoyed this chapter a lot, one of the more interesting ones IMO. I think it's the combination of the new setting and patrol stuff along with the mix of ...

Onward! Some new developments here, and more fighting. The most exciting part is when she starts getting hurt and really has to think to beat the Valnr. (Though I was ...

Continuing on! I want to note that I totally agree with everything Mea says. Here are the "plot thoughts" I wrote down as I read: - I like her face ...

Checking in as I read through. I really like the orb room and the whole idea of it, and how they visually change to reflect each character's growth. Very pretty ...