Lil_Pau

Wow. This was quite good. Wise choice of words and good imagery. The first stanza was slightly confusing though, especially the line "losing astronomy to every light." But overall, it ...

You can definitely improve this poem. It wasn't too bad, but not too good either. Try to add some punctuation and capitalization in some parts, and yes, put them in ...

Wow....this is very nice. The imagery is quite good. However, I felt that it could be improved into a better piece. I was a bit confused with the ending. After ...

Welcome to YWS! I have a few words to say; your poem is full of good imagery and it keeps the reader on the right track. I like it. I ...

Wow. Very touching. Yes, it sounds something like a broken friendship/relationship. Simple but meaningful. Just try more to deep into the meaning. Overall, a good poem. Keep up the good ...

Wow. A good poem. Good usage of words. From this I can tell that you don't really like black...don't you (just kidding :) ) Anyway, good job! Keep up! :)

Good work. I liked it, but there were some things that stopped the flow. First, try putting more punctuation next time. Second, you repeated the word 'Hell' around the last ...

Whoa...nice. I like it, and it was a good thing that you put it in stanzas. Stanzas keep your work neater, and readers can find your work easy to read. ...

This is a nice piece of work. Since Cade pointed out your errors, I don't have anything else to point out. I loved this as it had a lot of ...

I love this one, but there were some parts where the rhythm kinda threw me off, and there were some parts that were a little cliche. But overall, it was ...

Hmm, this was just OK for me. I kinda agreed with October Girl; the rhyme was just forced and unusual for me. Also, if this poem is about depression, try ...

Very nice poem! However, there were some parts that did not go well with the flow. It's very creative and enjoyable, with a lot of imagery, but it needs some ...

I would say that this is quite a good poem, but i didnt get the meaning very much. Try forming a clearer 'image' next time so it can give the ...

Hey, this is very nice! It needs a little improvement, but overall it was good. Reminds me a bit of Alice in Wonderland...:) Keep up! :)

This is a nice and emotional piece, but as ChernobyllyInclined said, it was not so original and uninteresting. Try putting more imagery into it, like for example, adding some metaphors. ...