Kit

I think this poem is a little bit shy, in its length and in that it doesn't really give away that much specifically. There are literally thousands of years of ...

The reason I clicked on this title was because one of my favourite poems is about fireflies, written about five hundred years ago by John Donne, "The Mower and The ...

I think of this as a sort of theatrical mood piece, it is delicate and refined, evokes this shimmering vision. I've had to defend music so much lately, which makes ...

You are expressing yourself eloquently, but I think the narrative aspects of it are lacking. It says exactly what you want to say, making your point and supporting it, and ...

I notice my colleagues below have said this is too short. I don't mind fiction being short at all, some of my favourite short stories are a few paragraphs long. ...

This is an interesting piece. I am not acquainted with your tone, so excuse me if I say something stupid that goes against your style. Structurally, I think you could ...

This is a really interesting subject, really you could do a whole series of poems about it progressing, if you wanted to. I have not read as much of your ...

Keep in mind there are many ways to tell a story and my opinion or your teacher's isn't nearly as important as yours. My overall impression is you are cramming ...

Please, please, please give this another line. You are such a tease! Thirteen lines? One off a sonnet? Mean. Actually I would like to see this as a villanelle, because ...

**puts on Yoda voice** Fragmenting sentence structure you are to make that rhyme.**end Yodification** You have some good ideas and good phrases, but they are oppressed by this idea.that you ...

(**puts on her best "Spinning into Butter" voice**) "Sometimes I want to run out onto the quad and hike up my skirt and pee all over everything” Wait, no. Wrong ...

I take you won't mind if I'm a little rough, you look like you can take it. I'm reviewing on my phone, so a full autopsy will have to wait ...

Okay, okay, okay, so Kyllorac has a point about the line breaks. Actually this occurred to me almost as stream of consciousness, it is quite immersive, the line breaks make ...

First of all, welcome to YWS, I hope it helps keep writing fun and allows you to meet many people as passionate about it as yourself. This poem feels really ...

The title is very effective, I've never seen anachronism used to create such strong cohesion between the eras, I mean, usually it's kind of tongue in cheek, self depricating, reenforcing ...