KatTrain

May I sit here as and I stare, this revision is just a suggestion Embody pen and paper bare, as Not a lonesome word escapes this Shallow mind, this empty ...

In the stillness, The wind brushes against the landscape. wind = movement. wind =/= stillness It was silent not so long ago. alright, this is an interesting line. But... what ...

Let’s get one thing straight: I am not a social butterfly. Psh obviously you're on YWS! ... just kidding.

Two shattered hearts, and one broken dream. this doesn't call for a period, a comma should suffice. Nothing was ever as it seemed. You never really explained what wasn't what ...

Post one poem at a time You need to work on the cliches in your poems. They have an angsty, whining way to them. Don't get me wrong, that's the ...

Wow. wow wowo wowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowo- Wow. Very nice poem. the wording, everything is wonderful. Do I love..? I think the dots make it more obvious that it is a question posed ...

I dislike the italicized words, even if they had a purpose. We were in our parent’s home town of Onslow, North Carolina for a festival that was celebrated every year ...

A shock. The periods are too abrupt. It. Makes. It. Choppy. Like lightning. a bit cliche with the spark being compared to lightening Leaps from your hand to mine. What ...

have fallen to my knees My face covered in tears Hardly able to breathe, So many times. The intro is beautifully written, so very relate-able I ask for Thy comfort, ...

I care And I am so sick Of sitting here Day after day, Week after week. Just watching, Waiting, For you to snap. Because comma when you hide Your feelings ...

**Watch out for edits that are just a comma, they're hard to see! Curtains up , and w hat a show! A girl on stage. Her feelings out, For the ...

If you wanted it to be more like a poem, just break it into stanzas. This is more like Prose then poetry, Today I walk Make this in the future ...

Bones hurting as I'd replace 'hurting' with another synonym blood drums against veins in a frenzy, relate able unsure (like the rest of your body) where it is or what ...

When I first saw this I was like 'oh gosh no please do not tell me someone has done a poem in this format again! But you definitely opened my ...

In time, they say, all will come to an end. Life wishes to bring peace to every day, how does this connect to the above? Though sometimes life doesn't get ...