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Re: Those Days
there are a lot of people who have written about the torture of mother earth, and there are a lot of people who should be, as we have real problems ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Carbology
Ahh, heartbreaking. The intention, the set up, the base for a really powerful piece is all here, but it needs a little more tweaking before I'd call it solid. And ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Deleted
Woooooooow~ Color me impressed, this was very well executed, clear, and poignant. The first two stanzas leave nothing to be desired. I can't. I am so glad you wrote them, ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: The Sociopath
this is the right way to do rhyming. i am so happy to see this good example, because by posting this, you've given younger writers a beacon to follow. this ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Unthinkable
Nice. This was honest, powerful, and carried itself through to the end in a logical pattern. There are a few things that need to be changed, I think, though, and ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Palestine
let's see, a quick tense fix: Not one day have you ever weaken. ^ when you use have, you have to use weakened: have weakened now, on to the piece ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Masque Facade
now now, come on. is this masquerader confident or not confident about his/her abilities? the middle stanza seems strong and cold, but the first and second two seem week, like ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Roaming words
Hey there. At first, I thought this poem was about something like "good news" or a sweet motto or something like that, but suddenly yer talking about rumors? This needs ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Script: Open House
First impression: WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE. that's probably not a problem in a movie as we'd have faces to tell them apart, but the names are all so non-descript that ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: E.A.
Woohoo~ So it was cool to read a piece that seemed to have been written with a lot of authority about how the transfer of power happens. I liked the ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: double down
mmmm, nice formatting of the quote, but i guess i don't understand. why use a quote you directly disagree with and ONLY say you disagree with it? there are so ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: What am I?
okay! i'll bite! this is a riddle. the thing about a riddle is, though, is that it has to be possible, with time, for the guesser to be confident about ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: A name that means traveler: Prologue *edited*
The first thing I want to say is that I'm confused between the two sections of this story. It seemed in the first part that she was already married with ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: An Alien in Paris
okay, i don't know if it's just from reading gal's review first, but now this poem really spoke to me on the idea of being american abroad, in a world ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: An Unusual Trip
Okay, I get it. No intent for anyone to get hurt, not really believing in the paranormal, but then something bad really did happen, but did you have to leave ...
Dec 30, 2012
