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Re: Little Sister Chapter Two(reboot)
Hi there! I loved this chapter! It is well written and it is a good story! There are a few lines that seemed out of place. The first is this ...
Oct 28, 2018 -
Re: Rest In Life Reality Requires
Hi there! This is a really good poem, I liked the rhythm of it to. The one line that confused me a bit is this one: "Then goal setting, None ...
Oct 28, 2018 -
Re: The maze of life
Hi there! So I really liked this chapter, there were just a few sentences that feel a little awkward. The first one: " Mother’s and father’s spirit are much cast ...
Oct 28, 2018 -
Re: Year 4
Hi there! So this is a good story, and I like the depth of it too. There are just a few sentences that need some fixing. The first one: "He's ...
Oct 26, 2018 -
Re: Welcome Mat
Hi there and Welcome to YWS! So this is an interesting piece of work, and I think that it is true, in a way. So I noticed how you put ...
Oct 24, 2018 -
Re: Chapter one: Sarah and the pink bunny Twiki
Hi there! Welcome to YWS! I hope you enjoy it here. So this is a really cute story! The only things I noticed were a few spelling errors, and a ...
Oct 23, 2018 -
Re: Midge's Birthday
Hi there! Cute story! I'm going to jump right into this review. So this line: "Nothing ever Greg touched stayed burnt." Should be: "Nothing Greg touched ever stayed burnt." Also ...
Oct 18, 2018 -
Re: The maze of life
Hi there! Welcome to YWS! I hope you enjoy it here. So this is a good story, and the only things I noticed were a few spelling errors. (Those really ...
Oct 18, 2018 -
Re: The Singing Girl
This is really good! I like how you didn't elaborate too much. You kept this simple, which shows the feeling really well. I also like the rhythm you set. The ...
Oct 18, 2018 -
Re: notes from cora
I love this!! I really feel it too. So the one thing I noticed was this line: "That was the too much she was afraid of but I think she ...
Oct 16, 2018 -
Re: Unworthy Hero ~ Chapter 8
Hi there! I like this chapter! I do think that you could go a little deeper into how Sarah feels at various times, especially during the class. Why does she ...
Oct 16, 2018 -
Re: a Romantic interest
Hi there! Welcome to YWS!! I hope you enjoy it here. So this is a good story, and I just have a few things suggestions I would like to put ...
Oct 16, 2018 -
Re: Searching back childhood...
Hi there! So there are just a few things that I noticed. The first thing was this line: "Fragile sweet soap water bubbles." This line feels rushed and awkward. Maybe ...
Oct 16, 2018 -
Re: Davisson-Germer Experiment (Experimental Verification of De-Broglie)
Hi there! So this is actually really interesting! I just saw a few spelling mistakes, and those really bother me. :). "He's the Micheal Jackson of our world." Did you ...
Oct 15, 2018 -
Re: Connection - 15
Hi there!! Okay, so this is a good story, and I LOVE the ending! However, I noticed a few spelling mistakes and a few other things. "I don’t got time ...
Oct 15, 2018